Boudin has Superhuman Strength

Saturday at the GasHouse was intended to be a ruck/run tour of nearby neighborhoods to market our Saturday workout to the locals. Upon recognizance, I learned 90% of the mailboxes are by the front door. In this day and age of video cameras, ring doorbells, and respect for privacy, Hunchback and I reconsidered the plan. Instead we’ll go with standard signage to hopefully recruit some new FNGs. So, Plan B, let’s go with a lowerbody focused bootcamp. Knowing Boudin and Stroganoff were nursing back injuries, I thought that might be helpful. One man accepted the challenge and one was not quite ready. At 0700 the circle formed with some good old 2nd F chatter. Observing a veteran crew I went right into it without hesitation.

SSH IC x 30, Imperial Walkers IC x 10, Toy Soldier IC x 10, Side to Side Butt Kicks IC x 10, THE patented left over right IC followed by THE patented right over left IC, MNC’s IC x 10. I think I was done after that. The groups split with 7 men following me out of the parking lot to the First Presbyterian Youth Building (aka The PAD).

The Q fairy had been there already to tape signage to the walls and drop coupons. Under the sheltered porch and around the building were 10 stations:

• Monster Walks – use a band, lateral step 15 right and return 15 left
• Dead Lifts – straight leg, 15 reps (grab a weight)
• Goblet Squats x 15
• Kettlebell Swings x 15
• Staggered Squat – 8 right, 8 left (grab a weight or ruck sack)
• Bulgarian Squat R x 15, (grab sandbags, single or multiple dumbbells)
• Bulgarian Squat L x 15 (grab sandbags, single or multiple dumbbells)
• Alternating Step Back Lunch – 8 right, 8 left (use weights)
• Glute Bridges x 15
• Hamstring Curls – sit on flat bench and use power band

After each exercise, PAX runs to the bottom of the stairs and returns to do a new exercise. Amid criticism and insults, I executed a run-through. Reps are at 15 so a premium could be placed on proper form. As the PAX spread out to get started “BOOM!” Boudin sits on the bench for hamstring curls and snaps the power band on the 2nd rep. I severely underestimated his raw power. His soccer legs are jacked up like the HULK, except their not green. All this rucking and walking, Boudin’s quads are bigger than Saquan Barkley. Despite Boudin F-ing up the stations, an experience Q improvised to announce, “we’ll now have 9 stations – thanks Boudin!”

I had intended for 3 total circuits but had not timed this, so we only completed 2-ish circuits. This kept the PAX together so there was plenty of conversation, accusations, insults and the like. Anytime legs are worked, it expedites the calorie burn. The Monster Walks are a challenge – if you have an individual band, try it at home (maybe not Boudin…he may need a fireman’s hose as a band for his tree trunk legs).

We had about 20 minutes remaining, and I had promised some core work. Sargento was very excited at this news as he had been improvising much of this workout thus far. We relocated to the back parking lot for a 4-corner stack.

1. 10 Crunches (not LBCs, real big-boy crunches)
2. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutter Kicks
3. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutter Kicks + 30 Freddie Mercs
4. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutters + 30 FM + 40 American Hammer

Now for round deuce – this is like a Big Mac, we’re double stacking. Keep the same 4 exercises and the reps (i.e. Set 1) at each corner, now add:

1. Circuit 1 + 10 Leg Raises
2. Circuit 1 + 10 Leg Raises + 20 Heels to Heaven

We ran out of time and headed back to base. If that wet your appetite (or other body part), I’ll work it into my next Q. Someone reminded me we had yet to recite the Pledge, so took care of that. Announcements: Extinction Run 3/4, Convergence at Folsom at 6:30 on 2/4, 2nd F Lunch at Hillbillies. Prayer Requests: Huck, Turtleman, Clavin’s M and I’m forgetting some. Sargento took us out.

Next time you see Boudin check out his massive legs. You won’t be disappointed.