This Better Be Good

I try to visit our lone PM workout at Midoriyama a few times a month. The boys started with a great core group and have done nothing but add quality in recent months. If you have not visited, you should adjust your work schedule to make an appearance. I can assure that you will be welcomed but you better be prepared as the mumble chatter is consistent if not constant. If you feel the sharp point of a barb, know that it’s a manly sign of affection. I’ve never been disappointed in a workout as the bar is set at a high level and the guys are always pushing and sometimes pulling each other along. So as a non-regular, Def Leppard asked me to guest Q which I gladly accepted the invitation veiled as a challenge. It went like this:

The last breath of winter has been hovering over Gastonia this week impacting attendance in the early gloom. In the pre-workout chatter, the boys shared they on Tuesday’s edition, they fought near hurricane winds that wouldn’t so much allow a bead of sweat to appear despite Freight’s beat-down. Twelve hours earlier, only the QIC’s attended our other three AO’s and props go to Tophat, JJ, and Huck for persevering the chilly gloom. The sun fought to warm the day to a pleasant 50 degrees, causing the PAX to de-winterize their gear even though Huck wore a shirt with sleeves. Sans FNG’s, a brief disclaimer was stated: “modify as you need.” Got the pledge in and started the warm-up announcing “Hillbillies”. As the PAX began performing the called exercise, YHC began performing Imperial Walkers. Five reps in, I was busted by the PAX ….what a way to begin. I had two choices: tuck and run or act like I really knew what I was doing…I chose the latter, trying to regain control of the crew. The first exercise went 10 IC before announcing Toy Soldiers – which we all performed with inconsistent precision for a cadence count of 10. A staple of each Midoriyama warm-up are Don Quxiote. If I didn’t do a set of those, I felt like a mutiny could occur and my guest Q would end before it barely started. We did 10 of those. Then Moroccan Night Clubs began as Billy Madison arrived to cap our PAX at 11. I quit the cadence to say we would continue until Billy joined the circle. Little did I know how long it took for him to primp and stretch to arrive like a kid making his way to the dentist office. Finally, Billy arrived when I announced the final warm-up: 5 burpees OYO. Let’s mosey.

Thang: I’m not running the P200 because I really hate to run. So the three stops I had planned were contained within a small space of Poston Park. I think this was readily accepted by most of the PAX until I hit them with the first segment: Walk the Plank. Everyone find a parking space to perform 7’s to begin with six Merkins, plank walk right to perform one plank-jack. Plank walk left to the parking line for five Merkins and so on, until the reps flip-flopped for a total of 25 reps of each. Keeping with the shoulder burn theme, the next part had us begin on the curb for six baby dips, crab-walking forward about four paces to perform one crab-cake (from crab position, balance core for left elbow to right knee then right elbow to left knee = 1 rep). Same process of decreasing/increasing reps (6 to 1, 1 to 6). A little mumble chatter ignited. We quickly dashed to the first soccer field on the right for a new routine which I have yet to name. The PAX lined across the end-line to perform a plank-thrust which is essentially a burpee without the push-up or the jump at the end. We would perform 5 plank-thrusts then sprint to the 18 yard line to get into plank position and wait out for the 30 second round to end. Once the timer buzzed, run back to the end-line and repeat. We did this for a total of 6 rounds. Onto the final segment of our workout.

We did a short fellowship mosey across the parking lot to a spot behind the concession stand where the coupon fairy had deposited a few items at various stations. I think this was virgin soil for the regular crew and Slaw was happy not to see many ant hills. A review of Freight’s backblast indicated 16 PAX were present for Tuesday. With improved conditions I built the workout around that number but quickly downsized for our fearless 11. I hammered ten wooden stakes in the ground with a card showing an exercise in a rough shape of a square. Had the numbers been even, we would have timed the rounds having two PAX sprint the perimeter and the exercise station would end once one PAX caught the other or three laps were completed, whichever ended first. The modification was to have one PAX be the “runner” and take three laps around while the others performed exercises. The benefit of the rounds being timed by a runner is we didn’t really stop (Gastone would be somewhat proud). The playlist included The Who, Van Halen, and AC/DC among others.

Round 1:

Round 2:

We ended four minutes ahead of schedule. So to make use of the time, QIC said pick the exercise you hated the most and do it again for about a minute. Huck and Freight said they hate to run, so they chased each other like two squirrels in an open field. Others found blocks, pvc, or bricks to lift. We went a couple of rounds before it was time to head back to the shovel flag as I wanted to be sure Mary’s dance card would be punched for the day. The ab work was to begin with a favorite: Baby Makers which was apparently was a new exercise to Swimmer but evidently something his fellow PAX were highly confident his form would be solid (practice makes perfect, at least for missionary style). Rather than count, I played the background music by Pornosonic to set the mood – though the speaker was not quite loud enough to be heard – still this one always generates mumble chatter and this today was no different. Sticking with the theme, I called for 10 Monkey Humpers. Just be glad the stopwatch was almost over and Pickle Pounders were not called. Instead I called for 22 Merkins to honor our Veterans, of which Oompa Loompa and Slaw have that distinction.

Announcements: Convergence at The Fighting Yank – Saturday 3/18. Should be a fun a wet one with rain in the forecast. Advisory Meeting will be Sunday at 7 pm. Freight will confirm destination – check your twitter for location. P200 next weekend (3/25-26), Burpee-thon, and Mud Run in the future.

Prayer Requests: Allen Tate’s family for their loss (visitation/funeral is Saturday), Floppy’s M’s Friend fighting cancer, Def Leppard’s M’s health, and there might be a few others I forgot to write down on my card. YHC took us out with a prayer.

Moleskin: I’ve not been very dedicated to the early morning gloom the past few weeks. In fact, this event is only my third official F3 post for March. I’ve been relegated to a video or self-prescribed routine in my garage, usually at night. Having the chance to Q brings internal motivation to prepare and plan but more importantly show up. If I were by myself in my garage doing Imperial Walkers instead of Hillbillies being on the list – no one would have called me out. Oddly that was one of the highlights for me. Busting guy’s chops is a form of acceptance. Payback was in my call for 5 burpees where I was joined with a chorus of groans. There is extra motivation in the presence of others, breaking a sweat and enjoying the day. Hopefully that met the high bar of Midoriyama and I’ll have a chance to lead again.