Early on in the pushing rocks challenge there was a bit of mumble chatter about a certain man. Not just any man, but one that was an OG and not just any OG, but the one at the top of the fitness mountain top. He lived in Dallas within a few burpee long jumps of the Old School. He had a pull up bar in his front yard, old tires for high-steps, a plyo box. Yes, his front yard looked like a miniature Spartan course. where not only did the man train, but they held family training events. Overweight Dallasians, would amble by and be in awe as this chiseled speciman carved his body into lean mean, fighting machine. And then his grandmaw’s house became available, and he left us for the hood on the Charlotte west side. He linked up with the Charlotte elite and make no mistake, he was one of the elite. But he was only part of the Gastonia region in legend, a Kotter if you will. He would catch some flack from time to time; would he ever join us again? An like the phoenix rising from the burnt ashes, that day came.
Warm-up:
- SSH IC x 100
- Don Q x 1000
- Brief disclaimer: “If you want your ass kicked, follow me…otherwise suck it!”
Mosey:
We went on a 10 mile run at a 6 minute pace. It was brutal…only stopping to sweat every now and then. Was this David Goggins that came to Q? We pressed onward circling back to the first stop at Parkwood Baptist Church. Hardly out of breath, the Q calls for 100 burpees. Next are parking lot 11’s – Mike Tyson’s on one end, lunges on the other. We discussed the upcoming re-match of NC State vs. Duke – the Q is clear as to where his allegiance lies despite the name on his diploma. At the end, he asks for a negative 10 count – we’re already late for the next stop. We perform burpee-long jump lunges to the next stop at the Veteran’s hospital no less than a mile away. We arrive at the bottom of a steep hill with a 10% grade. Time for Triple Nickle – SA grins broadly, it’s as if the Q stole his simple Weinke (minus the 15 miles we’ve run already). Diamond Merkins at the bottom followed by Big Boys at the top while holding a small boulder over-head. We carry the boulder up and down the hill that makes the Crowders back-side trail feel like Sunday stroll. The PAX are gassed and the Q tells them to suck it up – this is the warm-up.
We do an Indian Run for the next 6 miles hitting the greenway and circling through Sherwood n/h. We arrive at the elementary school – there is a bull dozer in our way – the Q lifts it with one hand overhead and tells the PAX to cross under – Holy Shit, Moses just parted the Red Sea (yes there is irony is cursing and quoting the Bible – the Q doesn’t give a shit – onward!). We arrive at the track – the Q hands out 50 lb weight vests and says to put them on NOW!. He then calls 3 exercises: Hand Release Merkins, Squats, and Flutter Kicks – SA is beaming with joy. The first round is 5 reps – run a lap and if you don’t return to start in 60 seconds, a 25-burpee penalty. We barely make it back. Round 2 is 10 reps with a 40 second return: we miss and do the penalty. This event goes on for eternity all the way to 50 reps and then the pyramid scales down the other side. The PAX can barely move at this point. Q looks at his watch and says jail break back to the AO! The Q tears out like Flash Gordon chased by lightening – the Q wins. The rest of us stagger into the parking lot. There is one minute left – burpees until time is called.
COT – extinction run in May, Goonie, Community Foundation Run. Prayers for the PAX that survived and those that didn’t. Happy Easter.
Moleskin – don’t invite David Goggins to Q and if you want a solid beatdown, reach out to Pizza Man, he’s a giver.
Thanks for the Q PM – enjoy spring break.
Parts of this story are true and others are fabricated – figure it out yourself, or better yet – don’t be a puss and post when Pizza Man Q’s and feel the pain (in a good way).
