I’m Not Dead…Yet!

May 15, 1971 yours truly entered the world. I have enough memory left to think back through some of the moments of my life, some of which was shared in my prior BB from Friday’s Downtown Q. Birthdays are the mile markers which we pass annually, some are more memorable than others. As we progress, they tend to get grouped in deciles so if you’ve done quick math or just paying attention, I crossed the respect threshold. Many of you grab the Q to celebrate your birthday and I followed that trend. You recall in elementary school when it was your birthday and maybe your mom sent or brought in a special treat like cupcakes or cookies to share with you classmates. Similarly for my Q at the GasHouse, I swung by Krispy Kreme to get some treats for my PAX. I hid them in a box just to stir some curiosity for the gathering of the circle. At 0700 I called for attention and provided a brief disclaimer, mostly an apology for what was about to happen. I cracked open the box of freshly glazed, warm Krispy Kreme donuts. The PAX eyes lit up and mumble chatter ensued. Whoopee was #2 in line and quickly circled to another spot ahead (that is unofficial confirmation from a cardiologist these delicacies are not that bad for you…even eating 2 at a time). Some PAX declined – good for them, though this isn’t a test of willpower. So, with the donuts distributed, time to start:

5 BURPEES OYO!!! – I checked the circle to see if anyone puked – seeing none – continue with my Seconds Timer and heavy metal/hair metal tunes blaring in the background, well sort of – speaker issues but finally got it working.

• SSH – Guns & Roses – Nighttrain
• 4×4 – Iron Maiden – Wasted Years
• Squat Jack Twist – Junkyard – Blooze
• 4 High Knee/4 Jab – Godsmack – Speak
• Shoulder Tap/Plank Jack – ACDC – Back in Black
• 8 Ct Body Builder – Black Sabbath – Neon Nights
• Jump Ropes – George Strait – Amarillo Morning (for Whoopee)
• Ski Abs – Ratt – Lay It Down
• 180 Squat Jumps – Van Halen – Unchained
• Crab Cakes – Steel Panther – Glory Hole
• All exercises at 30 seconds; rest came after set 1, then we went through it again

So – 10 minutes of straight cardio to begin the event. Still no one splashed merlot, I thought for sure but everyone held on. Regardless our cardio was up. We did the pledge and then split the bootcamp and Pain Lab. I had 6 guys take the pill of courage and follow me out of the parking lot. We moseyed and moseyed a bit further than usual. Across the street, up Churchill Dr, passed the library. We hung a right on Wilkins and then another right on Scotch. To my knowledge, GasHouse has never worked here before. Well it’s a hidden gem of a cul-de-sac that has a hill – not like the Mortimer, but enough for us to have fun with the Triple Nickel. 5 Burpees at the bottom and 5 Mike Tysons at the top. Watts Up reminded me that we did that routine on Friday – yes, yes we did. Sorry I’m a bit senile in my new old age. We tackled the hill, Whoopee was in the lead. After that appetizer, we fellowship moseyed SW along Scotch Dr. Roscoe was with me and since this was his old stomping grounds and we happened to be passing Pam Price’s house, I asked him to recount a story of his 9th grade prom date…(sorry show to know that one). At  the bottom of Queensgate and Scotch Dr is a yield sign with a green piece of paper taped. It listed the following:

• Burpees x 20
• Curl & Press x 25 (full block)
• Squats x 40 (half block)
• Cross Pulls x 25 (stretch band)
• Farmers Carry up/back (sand bags)
• SSH x 50

A lot of good F3 workouts are riffed from someone else. I’m no different so gave credit to the source I got my version which is one Tiger did at the Yank in Eagle Park. I hated that workout. I hated so much I’ve wanted to replicate it at the GasHouse so others could hate it too. Without further adieu, we now have the Over the Hill routine. You see, I’ve wanted to name a workout like Stroganoff has with the Forest Gump or the Wolfpack Grinder. We have the Vern and others that PAX groan when they hear that is what will be suggested.  If I can figure out how to make this worse than it already is, I’ll have Over the Hill 2.0 for your enjoyment soon. For now, the 7 of us took turns with the coupons so the order could be however you wanted or whatever coupons were available. Between each exercise, the PAX would traverse the hill a steady incline up Queensgate until you reach the stop sign at the intersection of Nottingham Dr. Up and back it’s 0.33/miles. At the Bourbon Chase, Freight shared the definition of an uphill climb as a “Soul Crusher” in one that you never feel you’re ever going to reach the top. Though short, I think this terrain qualifies. We spent about 25 minutes pushing our bodies and legs up and back – 5 times was the watermark for this occasion. I’ll be sure to adjust the schedule for the next one. With about 5 minutes to spare, we hustled back to the circle for the COT.

Announcements: Amoeba Ruck 5/22 at 0900; Blood Drive in June – see Tiger’s BB; Site Q change at GasHouse 5/22 – come celebrate Linus’ final moments as Site Q – he’s been a good one – steady for almost 3 years. Prayers: Turtleman, Big Pappy, Sister Act & 2.0, jobs for Dirt and CPAP. I took us out.

Moleskin – 50 years of life. I couldn’t have made it without family and friends. I joined F3 in November 2015. My M calls it a cult which it can be, but I prefer brotherhood as a better term. This gift we have is powerful. Think of that for a second – life is a free gift from the Lord with the only cost is for you to believe and trust in him. John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” And for F3, there is no charge, just your commitment and participation.  I mentioned Tiger’s workout that happened a few years ago. I had this one in my excel file, tweaking along the way and waiting for a good occasion – no time better than this milestone. More so to prove to me I’m not dead yet – though I was pretty sore after the workout. I guess that’s what I have to look forward to now that I’m over the hill.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. You guys are a great group to be a part of. Thanks to the PAX who allowed me to lead.

Short Sale