Author: Oompa Loompa (Page 8 of 11)

Sister Act’s Second Act

It’s a “Glorious First of June”. YHC pinch hitting for Pockets.

On this date in history:

1. HMS Shannon captured the USS Chesapeake.  Prior to surrender, Captain Lawrence implored his crew to “Not give up the ship!”. Believe it or not, Slaw was not a crewmember on the wooden sailing warship.

2. The French army is in a full retreat from the advancing German army. Some US Marines take up positions in a forest called Belleau Woods. A French officer tells the newly arrived Marines to retreat to Paris with the French troops. An unknown Marine officer answers him, “Retreat? Hell, we just got here.” The Marines (and the US Army) stopped the German attack, eventually counterattacking and driving back the Germans. Five months later the war was over. FYI, Oompa Loompa wasn’t involved in this battle either.

What did this have to do with the workout?

Not a dang thing.

Circle up. Warm up with Moroccan Night Clubs.

11 World War Ones. 11 Hand Release Merkins. Run a lap around horseshoe pits.

Rinse and Repeat until time is called.

Some people used a short cut. Every lap. You vs You. Freight got as many laps as he has birthdays. Gomer had to Gomer. Slaw had an epic event in the potty. Short Sale visited afterwards and returned soaking wet. You had to be there.

Wallsit for 60 seconds until all are finished.

Mosey to flag. 22 for vets.

Prayer requests for Pappy, Turtleman, Uranus, others on IR.

Service project, nail clippers and chapstick.

Blood drive. F3 Dads. DQ with Turtleman.

YHC closed out with prayer.

Broke and Wojo EC. Good to see Snozzberry come to another YHC Q from the other side of Charlotte. Dang, we should of siphoned some of his gas, as he obviously has enough to spare.

It’s 530pm. All experienced PAX.  Let’s get this started.

Circle up. I’m an idiot. It’s just a suggestion. Don’t get hurt.

Warm up.

22 for the vets, 22 SSH, 22 MNC, 22 Dips, 22 LBC

Mosey to the closest turd shack. BB King. One burpee at corner, bear crawl to next corner, two burpees, bear crawl to next corner, three burpees, you get the picture. End with five burpees at start. Plank for the six.

Wall sit air presses, dirty hookups, shoulder taps, donkey kicks, Mike Tysons, hip slappers, 10 reps all in cadence.

Reverse the BB King. Five burpees, bear crawl, count down to one.

Mosey to first light pole outside parking lot.

Rugby sprint. Run to first pole, do ten of the exercise listed on the sign, plank for six, run to second pole, exercise, so on and so forth, all five poles up to soccer field.

B.L.I.M.PS. 5 Big boys, 10 leg lifts, 15 Imperial walkers, 20 mountain climbers, 25 plank Jack’s, 30 SSH.  Reverse back down to 5 big boys.

Mosey over to light pole by fence. Suicide sprints, run to pole, do ten of the exercise listed on the sign, run back to start, run to second pole, exercise, yada, yada, yada.

Mosey back to flag. Duck-duck-goose burpee ring of fire. All pax plank, first pax burpee, run around ring, first and second pax burpee, second pax run around ring, second and third pax burpee, third runs, on and on until all pax finish. Two minute warning! Moroccan Night Clubs for one minute, finished with 22 for the vets!

Pledge.

Announcements

Goruck. Amoeba ruck.

Prayers.

Sister Act, Slim Shady dad, Big Pappy. If I didn’t mention someone, sorry.

Word.

Be the truth. Be a light. Be a light so bright with the truth that it drastically changes someone’s life. Like Saul’s on the road to Damascus when he was confronted with the truth. Tell people about Jesus. Be the good person in your circle.

Thanks for allowing me to Q.

Mayor wanted this as a shout out.

Done!

Much mumble chatter and fellowship prior to starting by the pax. Footballs flying.

Hey Seuss! No alien spaceships over Spencer Mountain.

530pm let go.

10 burpees for Slaw to kick off the party since no one was listening to YHC. Not like he would complain about doing burpees. Thanks bro!

One FNG so reviewed five principles of F3, disclaimer and other important facts.

I am an idiot. It is only a suggestion. Do only what you can do. Don’t get hurt. Have fun.

Standard Oompa warmup exercise set in cadence.

Pledge.

Mosey to short soccer field.

Stop halfway down for a set of burpees.

Pair up for DORA 123. Merkins, Squats and Hammers.

Pair off for football.

Shirts vs skins. Roscoe admitted Def Leppard’s fish belly paleness prevented his team from victory.

Def Leppard kept his streak going. Gomer found that not wearing boots unleashed his Jerry Rice impersonation.

Mosey back to flag.

Hearty welcome to FNG Cameron Hughes who is forever more christened as F3 Snozzberry!

Thoughts and prayers for the victims, their friends and family of the senseless tragedy yesterday.

COT.

YHC closed us out.

Mystery Q. Only ? listed on the schedule. Wojo said that he didn’t know who asked to Q. Who is not a regular at the premium afternoon AO in all of the F3 universe? I see Boudin. Nope. Buckeye? Nope. Wet Nutz? Nope. Aw crap, it’s Oompa.

And he’s handing out flyers and telling 5 pax to run and place them in strategic places in the park. It’s not even 530pm yet. But. But.

Shut up and run there, drop the flyer in the appropriate place and run your whining arse back to join the warmup circle.

While the volunteers do their duty, circle up. All experienced PAX, no disclaimer other than I am an idiot, so you are too.

10 SSH in cadence.

20 Abe Vigoda in cadence.

30 flutters in cadence.

40 Moroccan Night Clubs in cadence.

Everybody’s back let’s mosey.

Hey, I skipped 50 LBCs in cadence. You won’t mind.

Run to the first light pole at the parking lot by the ball field on the right.

As usual no one is listening to the Q.

Way too much mumble chatter.  It’s totally fine if you want to do more exercise. And in the wrong order. Batflipper. Whatever.

5 eight count body builders.

Run to first light pole. Do ten of the exercise called out as the “OUT” exercise.  It’s not hard. Unless you don’t listen.

Run back to start point. 5 more 8 count body builders.

Run to second pole. Do ten of the exercise called out as the “OUT” exercise. Run back to start. Do we stop here? NO. Did the Q say stop at the first pole? NO. Do we do the “BACK” exercise now? NO. Just listen to the Q. Yeesh. What a cluster. Do more 8 count body builders.

Run to third pole. Exercise. Ten reps. Run back to start. About dang time everyone finally gets their crap together and understands the Q’s intent.

Run to fourth pole. Rinse and Repeat. Perfection.

Run to fifth pole. Rinse and Repeat. I love it when a plan comes together.

Run to fifth pole. Do the “BACK” exercise listed. Run back to start. 8 count body builders.

By now even the reader (meaning you) knows how this ends.

Finally all done. Shoulder taps, Freddy Mercurys, hip slappers, squats, dips, seal Jack’s, dying cockroaches, mountain climbers and little baby flutter crunches. Took forever.

Mosey to parking lot across the road for DORA. Pair up.

100 Def Leppard Pushups or Carolina Dry Docks.

Pax 1 performs exercise Pax 2 mosey halfway down the parking lot and back.

200 American Hammers. Count right side only.

300 Monkey Humpers.

Mosey back to flag.

Prayer requests.

Broke’s mom, Vanilla Ice’s parents, Def Leppard, Cougar, Sister Act, others.

Announcements if you don’t already know, read the old backblasts or get on slack.

Freight took us out.

If you didn’t get your money’s worth the First F is unavailable to withdraw funds for you.