Forty Love Beatdown

Today could have been a reasonable excuse to stay in the warmth of a fartsack, snuggled (or spooned) next to our significant other, conjuring methods of cardiovascular excitement not named SSH or Merkin (or maybe they do? Yeah – I almost went there…). Instead, this Valentine’s Day began for 16 HIMs in the gloom, in a shield lock to support Tophat who lost his brother last week in an accident. My first Q at The Storm happen to coincide with these two events. I had a couple of ideas to ensure the PAX would get their money’s worth. It took a few minutes to set up the workout so I arrived to the center of the circle at 0530 to learn we had two FNG’s ready to do battle. I manufactured a quick disclaimer: “Modify as needed, don’t kill yourself, don’t try to keep up with Dolph…” PAX: “Dolph is QIC at Folsom.” What? My very first exercise was just for him:

• 5 Burpees OYO
• Seal Jacks – IC x 10
• Toy Soldiers – IC x 10
• High Knees – IC x 10
• Don Quixote – IC x 5…(hit Whoopee’s limit for warm-up)

A very short mosey to the tennis courts. An early recon mission failed to find the lights that would have been nice to illuminate our movements but we’re used to dancing under the pale moonlight. QIC Fail #2: the speaker was not fully charged to play the soundtrack built for the workout. I was excited because I finally down-loaded George Strait to fit Whoopee’s odd musical appreciation (odd because of his disdain for Rush which were songs #4 and #13 on my playlist). Next time I’ll be better prepared. YHC earned one athletic letter at Ashbrook High School. At 5’9”, 130 lbs, my scrawny frame wasn’t suitable for the gridiron or hardwood at the high school level, so I focused on tennis. I was privileged to play with some good guys on a good team that finished 2^nd in the conference, won regionals and top 5 in the state tournament. Our team’s bonds exist to this day. Nearly all of our practices and match warm-ups began with two drills that I wanted to share with my F3 brothers.

The Thang:

Set I

• “W” drill – from the baseline, run to the net, backpedal to the “T”, run to the net and backpedal to the baseline. Upon explaining this and noticing Anthrax and Roscoe were present, likely for the first time since “The Incident,” another disclaimer was shared (not sure who – Stroganoff?) – “if running backwards, watch out for people that may be on the ground behind you…” We had 4 courts with two sides of each court – that was 8 reps. Oh yeah, perform 2 burpees between running each court.
• “Tracers” – begin at the baseline, run down the alley to the net, backpedal to the service line, side-step to the center line, forward to the net, side-step to the alley, and backpedal to the baseline. Perform 8 reps moving along each side of the 4 courts. Between each court execute 5 jump squats (Tophat’s choice).

Set II

The Ultimate Four Corners – instead of 4 exercises at each corner, we ran all 4 courts. At 8 different points was a cone, arriving at each cone perform the following:

• Merkins – 15 x 8
• Flutter Kicks 15 x 8 (omahaed from 30)
• Freddie Mercury 20 x 8 (each leg) – that is 40 total

Set III

Time was running out so I offered the PAX a choice between Dora or Mary. They chose Dora. So partner up: P1 runs a suicide among 3 cones while P2 performs the exercise in aggregate:

• WWI x 50
• Plankjacks x 100
• SSH x 150

COT:

After the first set, I shared a brief summary of the shield lock, how the Roman soldiers formed a tight pack and used their shields to protect them in battle. Roscoe helped me with additional color. He shared the soldiers wouldn’t be upset if a fellow fighter lost their sword but would be if they lost their shield. The importance of remaining a protected, cohesive unit. Arriving at base, I offered a brief devotional:

Joshua 1:9 – “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

In challenging times, our faith provides the comfort and guidance to shepherd us through. For those of us in the gloom, we have come to believe in the three elements of F3 which work in concert to provide a foundation of support to help fellow brothers, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly. Presence can be a silent motivator to push the next guy through, not to meet your goals but to get to his.

We performed name-o-rama and named our FNG’s. Davidson Hobson is the Director of Admissions at Gaston Day School. He earned the name Mr. Hand after giggles from Whoopee, Bandit, and Roscoe quoting lines from Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Next we had Josh Valentine (coincidental name?). Josh is the interim youth pastor at a church in Gastonia (I can’t recall the name). He is also the son-in-law of Mastodon. While working on an appropriate name, Josh’s stomach evidently was reeling from the workout. As he splashed merlot in the high school parking lot, the PAX named him Zofran. We assured him that was a badge of honor that not many PAX have earned. As the QIC, I has mixed emotions. Concern over for our friendly new guy’s wellbeing, but also a devilish sense of pride the workout had pushed the limits.

It was great to have a larger audience today. The mumble chatter was a little louder than normal (despite Mayor fartsacking – he loves burpees). It was a fun group that pushed each other through the misery of each rep. Godspeed to Tophat and his family in their time of tragedy. Thanks for the opportunity to lead. Come back next week at The Storm for round 1 of Mayor week in Cramerton.