Rock Pushing Mutha-Shut-Yo-Mouth!

After 3 months on IR and crutches, I have learned 3 things. 1) That extra hour in the bed feels good. 2) I would rather get up in the morning and do rock pushing thangs with my rock pushing friends. 3) All that hard work goes away quick when you stop posting. So I’m out of shape (my first real post in 3 months was Saturday at Painlab), I’m still having some pain in my hip from a torn labrum, and I started rehab less than a week ago…..I was planning to let Sparky pick up the Q this morning (he had told me he would last week if I needed him to).

So he texts yesterday a simple message: “Are you good with the Q tomorrow?”. I almost replied asking him to do it for me. I’m not ready. I’m out of shape. I’m not sure if I can do it yet. I had my reply all typed out but before I hit send, I thought “What would the Chief do?” We joke around about it but I’m serious. I’m thinking what better way for the Assistant Chief to set that rock pushing example than to Q on his 2nd post? I felt I needed to challenge myself to. Can Montross bring a Painlab-style beatdown despite not being in shape and able to run? Damn right I can! I immediately erased that reply and told Sparky I had it, bring blocks. I scrambled to put together a weinke unlike any other I have done before. I was going to set it up to push as hard as I could and let the team pull us through to the end of the workout.

I arrive a little early to have time to stretch and I see a few vehicles and some early birds getting in some running. Volt was running through the park and Hacksaw took off just before 5:30…both guys have to cut out early to get to work. I respect that! Many familiar faces in Folsom this morning though a few did not make it. There is a fng named Chris Gattis (maybe I spelled that right) who was recruited by Stepdown. He just showed up this morning. Nice guy, in the Guard, military background, works with boxes…welcome. The Chief pulls in about 5:29 bumping Wu-Tang. I’m feelin’ it. I let him know we have a FNG and he spins in circles celebrating. Quick disclaimer – I’m not a professional….yada yada yada. Let’s go.

Warmarama:

SSH – 10 IC (noticed I was going a little slow so I picked up the pace at the end)
Props to the FNG…he knows how to count along.
Def Leppard Merkins (aka CDDs) – 10 (a little Q counting fail here….there’s more, don’t worry)
Monkey Humpers – 10 IC (yet another Q fail…IC didn’t work well)
Did something else here….I made it up on the spot and don’t remember.

Pledge….how appropriate Huck still has the Painlab shovel flag. I’m so glad he had it though…I was not trying to run to the flag pole today.

Grab a block and let’s go to the tennis courts. I turn on the boom-box – nothing but 90s rock today guys.

With the Burpeethon coming up, I felt it would be a good idea to go through the burpee in detail to make sure everyone had a good grasp of this wonderful exercise. Some say it is the most complete full-body exercise you can do.

10 Burpees OYO – I figure a little pre-test is a great way to evaluate everyone’s burpee efficiency.

10 to 1 Deconstructed Burpees – the best way to hone your skills is breaking down a problem task by task and practicing those tasks. So we broke the burpee down and we practiced it. (thanks Huck for helping me get the flow together…I needed some practice too)

10 Reverse Burpees OYO – A few guys from Snowbird got the joke when I said “now I’m gonna put my thang down, flip it, and reverse it”. The reverse burpee threw a few Pax for a loop…but it’s basically just a burpee with a jump and clap at the beginning.

Super Mike Tysons 10 to 1 – Now for the advanced section. There were MANY selections to choose from. Slaw and Oompa gave me some suggestions on Group Me but I ended up with my own little variation – Super Mike Tysons. I have called them a few times. What are they? For 10 Super Mike Tysons, you do 10 Mike Tysons and 10 Burpees. I fully intended to Omaha to leave time for the next exercise but I believe the whole group was about to fall out after the second set. We ended up going 10 to 9…maybe next time. Recover! I go grab Huck’s deck of cards for the next part. This is the part I planned to have the Pax help pull me through to the end.

Let’s play Blackjack. We split into 2 teams, Huck and I are captains. We play a hand of blackjack, each team completes all the exercises on their hand. However the team who loses the most hands also gets 5 blockees at the end. We played a few hands, we did a lot of exercises but it was kinda hard to keep up with in the dark. At that point, I just started pulling cards from the deck. We did Merkins, we did lunges, we did all kinds of stuff. I decided we’d all do 5 blockees because it just wouldn’t be right to sit there and watch our brothers do blockees alone. Done.

We have 7 minutes left so we circle up for a round of Mary. I called 25 LBCs (also had another Q fail which Sparky gave me a hard time about….everyone called me Gomer). So, I call Sparky next and 10 burpees he says. Crap! We do them. I call Hank – 10 Blockees. Crap, Crap! I call on Allen Tate – 10 Blockees. WTF! We do them…well, we try…I was just controlling my fall at that point. I think that was all. Hell I don’t know at this point, I was about to lose consciousness! Time!!!!!!!!

COT: Prayers for BP’s church, our families, our kids, Maddox (the young man ‘lost’ at Rankin Lake), his family, and those searching/investigating, and those affected by and supporting recovery from the floods after Florence. YHC prayed us out.

Oh yeah, and we named our FNG Clubhouse. Let me tell ya, he was ALMOST Sleeping Beauty. He answered the ‘favorite Disney princess’ question. However, we didn’t rush it…the Chief said we should ask a few more questions just to be sure. Turns out Chris works for a company that builds boxes. Now you know Folsom loves the Friday movies with a passion! Chief says ‘What you stealing boxes for, you trying to build a clubhouse.” If you know Friday, you know that line! Clubhouse it is.

Moleskin: Thanks for the opportunity and the push. I tried my best to stay connected while I was injured but it was tough not getting out there and posting with you all. Through Twitter, Slack, Group Me and breakfast each Saturday, you guys kept me motivated and itching to come back. I’m out of shape again right now, but I can tell it’s not as bad as it was when I started. All that work wasn’t for nothing. I’m going to try to balance working hard and rehabbing and I fully expect to be back to where I was in May pre-injury sooner than later. I do still have the torn labrum but it didn’t seem serious according to the doctor. Hopefully it’s something I can manage and I won’t need surgery down the road. Looking forward to seeing all of you guys in the Gloom soon!