Month: November 2019 (Page 8 of 10)

Marriage has a way of altering our vision. We go in expecting our mate to fulfill our hopes and to make us happy. But this is an impossible order for our spouse to fill. Unrealistic expectations breed disappointment. The higher your expectations, the more likely your spouse will fail you and cause you frustration.

If a wife expects her husband to always be on time, clean up after himself, and understand all her needs, she will likely live most her married life in constant disappointment. But if she gets realistic and understands that he’s human, forgetful, and sometimes thoughtless, then she will be more delighted when he is responsible, loving, and kind.

Divorce is nearly inevitable when people refuse to allow their spouses to be human. So there needs to be a transition in your thinking. You must choose to live by encouragement rather than by expectations. The way your spouse has been for the last ten years is likely what he or she will be in the future apart from your loving encouragement and an intervention from God. Love puts the focus on personal responsibility and improving yourself rather than on demanding more from others.

Jesus painted a picture of this when He talked about the person who saw the “speck” in his brother’s eye but didn’t notice the “log” in his own.

“How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye” (Matthew 7:4-5).

Does your spouse feel like they’re living with a speck inspector? Are they routinely on edge, fearful of not living up to your expectations? Would they say they spend most days sensing more of your disapproval than your acceptance?

Perhaps you’d respond by saying that the problem is not with you but with them. If they really do come up short in a lot of areas, why is that your fault? As far as you’re concerned, it takes both of you doing everything you can to make marriage work. If your mate doesn’t want you to be so critical, they need to realize that the issues you bring up are legitimate. You’re not saying you’re perfect, by any mean, but it does seem like you should be able to say what you think. Right?

The problem with this kind of attitude is that few people are able to respond to criticism with total objectivity. When it seems clear that someone is unhappy with you – whether by direct confrontation or the silent treatment – it’s hard not to take their displeasure personally. Especially in marriage.

After all, unlike any other friendship, your relationship with your spouse began with both of you bending over backwards to please the other. When your mate was your boyfriend or girlfriend, they were completely charmed by your personality. You could almost do no wrong. Your life together was so much easier. And though you didn’t expect it to stay that way forever, you certainly didn’t see them being so sinful and getting so angry with you. You never expected that this man or woman who promised to love you could get to where they didn’t even seem to like you.

So when this stark contrast becomes living reality, your natural reaction is to resist it. During the early days of marriage, you may have been more inclined to listen and make subtle changes. But as the years go by, your spouse’s disapproval only tends to entrench you. Rather than making you want to correct things, it makes you want to dig in even deeper.

Love is too smart for that. Instead of putting your mate in a position to rebel, love teaches you to give them room to be themselves. Even if you’re the goal-oriented type who places high demands on yourself, love calls you not to project your hard-driving ways onto your mate’s performance. You must realize that marriage is a relationship to be enjoyed and savored along the way. It’s a unique friendship designed by God Himself where two people live together in flawed imperfection but deal with it by encouraging each other, not discouraging them.

The Bible says, “Encourage the exhausted, and strengthen the feeble” (Isaiah 35:3). “Encourage one another and build up one another … Encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone” (1 Thessalonians 5:11, 14).

Don’t you want married life to be a place where you can enjoy free expression of who you are, growing within a safe environment that encourages you even when you fail? Your spouse does too – and love gives them that privilege. If your wife or husband has told you on more than one occasion that you make them feel beat down and defeated, you need to take these words to heart. Make a commitment to daily let go of unrealistic expectations and become your spouse’s greatest encourager. And the person they’re created by God to be will begin to emerge with new confidence and love for you.

Guard my soul and deliver me; do not let me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You. – Psalm 25:20

Today’s Dare

Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in your home. Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much, and tell them you’re sorry for being so hard on them about it.  Promise them you’ll seek to understand, and assure them of your unconditional love.

Earlier in the week, I realized that not only did I have a rare Saturday off with no commitments other than a 2:00 football game (2.0) …. so do I want Pain Lab ? Nah …. I have Starkville Monday … so what’s LinuS got? Wait !!?! He’s lined up for the Yank? And Gashouse is left hanging and flapping in the Arctic wind? Can’t have that !! I grab it and put together the rest of a weinke.
However last night as I’m slipping into unconsciousness, my M awakens me that her good friend Sharlene ( Oompa Loompas M ) was just involved in a bad accident where a young man misread traffic light, entered intersection and both cars became toast. Thankfully they both are only sore and banged up. It was a rough night to sleep knowing my M would stay up texting until The Oompas made it home from ER. Plus I prayed for health and well being of all… so before beginning today’s workout I disclosed this to all assembled and asked for a brief moment to thank God for their health and recovery ….
After the silent reflection I call for pledge , give disclaimer seeing no FNG..
Since it’s cold, I tell all we’ll warm up nice and slow …. take it easy ….
… in cadence …. jump lunges!!! 10
6 burpees
+/- mountain climbers 20 Ic
10 merkins
Lastly 5 donkey kicks ( figured this might be harder than usual since you must balance without a wall to kick against)

My next exercise comes from Rudolph a few weeks … months maybe ….. back … since I intended on using arena at Schiele front doors, I asked Watts Up if he was using area and informed him of what I had in store. He likes it so much he wanted us all to join together …. pain Lab took a few to get on over so we completed 40- 100 SSH while waiting.

Pain lab remained back and may or may not have caught instructions , I felt that they’d catch on once they saw what we were doing and Watts Up scolded all as if he were the teacher catching the class mistreating the Substitute.
Climb onto slopes area, bear crawl up and along top run change to crab walk down next run lunge walk left lungs walk right and finish with lungs walk …. complete cycle twice over…. now we REALLY split up.
Mosey over to steps at First Presby for merkins 2 per step all the way up and crawl bear down …. uhh that sucked so bad even I did not want a repeat …. so bunny hop each step all the way up and move over to outdoor chapel for 10 abyss merkins
10 more abyss merkins and 10 lbcs
10 AByss, 20 flutter kicks hanging legs off bench and 10 lbcs
10 abyss, 10 dying cockroaches, 20 flutters and 10 lbcs
Mosey long way to Sherwood assemble ar Playground
Run halfway around track switch to Nur and complete with 5 pull-ups do this twice as nice
Next karaoke one direction halfway switch and finish with 5 pull-ups doing twice again
Some did extra lbcs planking and / or dying cockroaches until all ready to move over to hilly area for one more crawl bear down ( I did promise another since I Omahad a second trip on steps down… extra fun with the frost.
Mosey back to planetarium and 10 suspension merkins wall sits, wall sits with arms up, marching wall sits, punching bags, more suspensions, hip slappers twice more wall sits and suspensions before wondering if we should rejoin Pain lab …. while they finished current timed exercise I called 6 Burpees! Timed perfectly !! Windshield wipers, merkins, dying cockroaches
Jane Fondels and lastly ski abs….. there’s no bells ( wait for 3-4 seconds …) ah … there it is!!!!
Early signups for Tuna
Christmas town 5k coming up
Please consider posting at newest AOs Starkville ( Monday’s ) and San Quentin( Friday’s) both at 6pm from Biggerstaff in Dallas
Prayers for Oompa Loompa and M
Freights family
Easy Rider family

It was truly a great morning to be here even though it was cold I really appreciate this rare opportunity not only to lead a Saturday but to post for whole workout! Thank you men!!

Post soon, post often, Hell,,,, just post!!

Today will be hard. But as you seek God’s strength and wisdom, you will be able to get through it. This day could be a milestone in your marriage if you allow it to be. So resolve to focus on what the Lord may be saying to you, and purpose to follow His leading.

Today is about personal responsibility. It’s something we all agree others should have, but we struggle to maintain it ourselves. Over the past few decades, there’s been a decline in personal responsibility. More and more, people seem less likely to acknowledge their own mistakes. We see it in politics. We see it in business. We see it in celebrity headlines.

But this is not just a problem with the rich and famous. To find an example of someone who has an excuse for every action, all we have to do is look in the mirror. We are so quick to justify our motives. So quick to deflect criticism. So quick to find fault – especially with our spouse, who is always the easiest one to blame.

We tend to believe that our views are correct, or at least much more correct than our mate’s. And we don’t believe that anybody, give our same set of circumstances, would act much differently than we have. As far as we’re concerned, we’re doing the best we can. And our spouse just ought to be glad we’re as good to them as we are.

But love doesn’t pass the blame so easily or justify selfish motives. Love is not nearly as concerned with its own performance as with other’s needs. When love takes responsibility for its actions, it’s not to prove how noble you’ve been but rather to admit how much further you have to go.

Love doesn’t make excuses. Love keeps working to make a difference – in you and in your marriage.

That’s why the next time you’re in an argument with your spouse, instead of working up your comebacks, stop and see if there’s something worth listening to in what your mate is saying. What might happen in your relationship if instead of passing blame, you first admitted your own wrongs? As the Scripture says, “Rebuke is more effective for a wise man than a hundred blows on a fool” (Proverbs 17:10 NKJV).

Love is responsible and is willing to admit and correct its faults and errors up front. Are you taking responsibility for this person you chose for yourself as the love of your life? How deliberate are you about making sure your spouse’s needs are met? Or are you only concerned with your mate fulfilling yours? Love calls us to take responsibility for our partner in marriage. To love them. To honor them. To cherish them.

Are you taking responsibility for your own faults? Have you said or done things to your spouse – or to God – that are wrong? Love desires to have a right relationship with both God and your mate. Once that is right, the stage is set for other areas to fall into place.

A real heart of repentance may take a while to grow in you. Pride is very resistant to responsibility, but humility and honesty before God and your spouse is crucial for a healthy relationship.

This doesn’t mean you’re always wrong and your spouse is always right. This is not a demand that you become a doormat. But if there is something that’s not right between you and God, or you and your spouse, then that should be the first priority.

“If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8). However, “if we confess our sins, [God] is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Confess your areas of sin first, then you’ll be on better ground to work things out with your spouse.

In order to walk with God and to keep His favor, you must stay clean before Him. That doesn’t mean you can never stumble but you confess it to God and ask for forgiveness when you do.

Can your spouse say that you have wronged or wounded them in any way and never made it right? Part of taking responsibility is admitting when you’ve failed and asking for forgiveness. It’s time to humble yourself, correct your offenses, and repair the damage. It’s an act of love. God wants there to be no unresolved issues between the two of you.

The problem is, to do it sincerely you must swallow your pride and seek forgiveness regardless of how your spouse responds. They should forgive you, but your responsibility does not lie with their decision. Admitting your mistakes is your responsibility. If they have wronged you, leave that for them to deal with at another time.

Ask God to show you where you have failed in your responsibility, then get it right with Him first. Once you’ve done that, you need to get right with your spouse. It may be the most difficult thing you’ve ever done, but it is crucial to taking the next step in your marriage and with God. If you are sincere, you may be surprised at the grace and strength God give you when you take this step.

When you judge another, you condemn yourself, since you, the judge, do the same things.  – Romans 2:1 HCSB

Today’s Dare

Take time to pray through your areas of wrongdoing.  As for God’s forgiveness, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse.  Do it sincerely and truthfully.  Ask your spouse for forgiveness as well.  No matter how they respond, make sure you cover your responsibility in love.  Even if they respond with criticism, accept it by receiving it as counsel.

we ran to the flag at the top of the hill after a little warm up.

ran to the parking lot for some:

11s

Flutters

Tiger squats

Then ran back down to the tennis courts and did:

The Al Carmichael

Last tennis court and back

10 Merkins there and when you return to start. Followed by a round of each:

10 lunge jumps

10 LBCs

3rd tennis court and back

10 Parker peters

10 dying cockroaches

10 burpees

Lap around the courts

50 squats

15 SSHs

5 burpees

Lots of great men (not Allen Tate) rolled out of bed this morning. Couple of return from the dead kotters as well have been showing up lately. Encouragement goes a long way to push brothers forward.

Saw this and thought it was relevant.

Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, Faith looks up

Keep that in mind as you encounter people that are hurting and encourage them to push forward 1 day at a time.

It was cool and gloomy.  SEC was done by some.

YHC completed an EC mosey about 0529.   No FNG’s; no warm up; let’s get it on.

The Thang

Mosey to the lower end of the parking lot in Martha Rivers for some 22’s.

Same as 11’s but reps add up to 22 and the reps are counted up/down by 2.

One side of parking lot – Merkins; run to other side for Squats; all OYO until all sets are done – 110 reps of each exercise

Very short rest before a round of 55’s, yes…..55’s.  Same as 11’s with the reps on each side of the parking lot adding up to 55 and reps counted up/down by 5.

One side of parking lot – Flutter kicks; run to other side for Moroccan Nightclubs; all OYO until all sets are done – 275 reps of each exercise.

Plenty of time left

Meander to the closest picnic shelter for some table/bench work:

IC work as follows:

Derkins X 15 – Step Ups X 30 – Dips X 15 – LBC’s X 30

Rinse – Repeat for another full set under the shelter

Time to mosey back to Snoballs for some quick Mary before finishing up.

Great work men.

Announcements – Prayer Requests – Closeout with Prayer

Sign up for the P200 – We have a chance for 3 full teams

As I write this….I’m sore from my own workout.  I guess that’s good.

Thanks for the push and supporting my Q.

Until the next one.  Aye!

Stroganoff

This will be short and sweet, just like me.  Diablo Sammich was calling me, thanks to Watts Up for allowing me to step in.  It’s a guaran-DAMN-teed way to make sure you post 😉

I saw Pavel has a new bodyweight routine to incorporate hanging as an exercise.  Let’s try it out.  5:30 is here and Watts Up, Dry Rub and Pedal are ready to go.  Wait, here’s Hushpuppy, pulling in hot (aka late).  Wait, Pedal is going for a run?  He and HP are in the P200?  It’s okay, not everyone is man enough to ruck.  Off Dry Rub, Watts Up and I go.

Routine:  get to the castle, do 15 merkins, 10 squats, and 30 seconds of hanging.  All with the sack.  After that, we take a lap, then repeat.  I think we got in 6 rotations.  Back to start.  Good work.  Especially on converting the hanging to pull-ups!  Got to love some extra weight.

PRAYERS:

Dry Rub’s family for health

Pedals’ father for health

HP’s pastor for health

STUFF:

P200 and Christmastown

Post at Starkville and San Quentin!  Support Rockabilly

Anyone hungry lately?

Always a pleasure, be real Smokey.

Rudolph

“And I ran
I ran so far away
I just ran
I ran all night and day.”

Pledge.

Run to Martha Rivers.

Some ran 4, some ran 5, some ran 6.

We came back to the flag in the twilight of dawn.

40/50 Challenge. Speed for Need at Christmastown 5K. Santa Hustle 5K or Half Marathon.  Christmas party January 4th, 2020.

No one got injured or lost, so no silver alerts were invoked.

Thanks for letting the old man Q.