Author: Short Sale (Page 4 of 19)

I woke up at 5:06 am this morning. If I were posting normally, I’d begin frantically running around to get contacts in and into workout attire. But not this morning. I relieved myself and then crawled back in the fartsack. Only today, the fartsack would eventually be defeated. I slept another half hour before I began morning duties of walking our dog and getting her fed. I had plenty of time that I arrived at the newest AO in our region located in McAdenville. JJ and Flintstone were already in the parking lot, Flintstone having completed some EC in the form of his new EC “Thunder” workout. The cavalcade of vehicles began rolling into the lot. It was time to go. A brief disclaimer opened, and some light chatter ensued.

Warm-up:

Imperial Walkers IC x 11, Toy Soldiers IC x 10, the Patented Right over Left IC followed by the Patented Left over Right IC (apparently, I don’t count the cadence correctly), Arrows IC x 10, SSH IC x 10

Thang: stay in the circle, we’re doing Mary first b/c the former Nantan requested a core workout since he is limited by a bum elbow. We did all of these exercises for 30 seconds each w/ no rest between.

• Reverse Crunch
• American Hammer
• Raised Penguin Crunch
• Turtle Crunch
• Legs at 90 degrees, Alt Toe Touch
• Bear – R hand to L knee
• Bear – L hand to R knee
• Burps
• Genie Crunch: elbow to knee
• Genie Crunch: knee to elbow
• Heels 2 Heaven
• Crunchy Frog
• Hollow Hold
• Ski Abs

The offer was made to remain in the parking lot and do 4 more sets of that – the PAX quickly opted for a mosey. We exited the parking lot and played frogger to move up Main Street. Thankfully no PAX were harmed in the travel. Once passed Terra Mia and the salon, we nestled into the small lot between buildings. Ready for the Stack and Run? Sure you are…goes like this. 50 single count SSH’s run down Poplar Street (the back street) hang a left and another left to circle back up Main Street to our spot. Follow this routine stacking the exercises after each lap:

• 50 SSH, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, 20 HR Merkins, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, 20 HR Merkins, 10 Burpees, lap

This is where time was running low. The Q’s M had scheduled an 8 am vet appointment for our sick dog so I had to cut this short a bit. Hustle back to the base.

COT: Annihilation at the Yank tomorrow w/ Boudin, FIA starting in Belmont – tell your M, July 4th at the Yank 7-8 am workout followed by reading the Declaration of Independence. Prayers: Orangeman asked for prayers for the Grant family and shared praise for his daughter and family relocating to Gastonia. Next Q’s for Snooze will be Tesla on 6/9 and Radar 6/16, and Oompa on 6/30 (open is 6/23).

Debrief with Flintstone, we may relocate where we meet in McAdenville. Navigating the 3 point intersection could be problematic so moving up Main Street could alleviate that and still leave plenty of room to explore at this new AO. We had 7 guys double post having suffered through Breaker’s Q at Tequila Sunrise. A handful of guys walked to the coffee shop for 2nd F. Hopefully one of your summer Fridays allows you to hit the snooze button and still get to a workout.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

It’s 0530 am and you’re semi awake in your bed. You know the workout you had planned to attend just began. You hit the snooze button once or twice and then gave up. The fart-sack won that battle. You feel guilty and maybe a little pissed off. We’ve all been there. I think one of the most common excuses from the men we recruit is “that’s too early.” I battle that myself, even as a veteran PAX. Truth be told, I hate getting up early. As I type out this preblast, it’s approaching 11 pm on Sunday night. I’d say I’m more of a night person.

So how can I help you with this occasional fartsack challenge – might I interest you in a workout that begins a little later, at least on a Friday? I see that little gleam in your eye. While I have your attention, allow me to explain more. On Friday mornings this summer, at 0645 am an shovel flag will be posted in McAdenville. If you’re on Main Street facing Pharr Yarns, it will be the larger parking lot to your left and we’ll set up closer to the river. We’ll do a bootcamp workout for 45 minutes. After the workout, there are a few options nearby if anyone would like to have some 2nd F time with a coffee.

We’ve enjoyed McAdenville under the lights at the Christmas Town 5k and one special event on a Labor Day. This summer time workout will be a good test run for this AO to see if it can find a permanent slot on our workout schedule. When I pitched the idea to the SLT, they were agreeable. The later time at 0645 offers the option for a double post (Slaw is already eyeballing more skillet opportunities). Or it could give you a little extra sleep from a heater at Midoriyama or if you have an extra IPA on a Thursday evening. So hopefully you’ll join me one Friday morning this summer for Snooze, beginning Friday, June 2nd at 0645.

Hit me up if you have any questions or would like to get on the Q schedule.

It seems as people age, the weather forecast and weather conditions are central to one’s daily life. Take my Mom as an example, who believes NBC’s Brad Panovich guidance ranks #3 following the Lord and her doctor (her pharmacist might be a tight #4). All I have to do is bring up an outdoor event or traveling on the road and my dear Mom will share Brad’s forecast. I think she’d adopt him if he was willing. For those of us with an upcoming Q, we tend to pay a slight bit more attention to the weather to know if our plans will work or need an Omaha.  Aside from the Convergence, there were some recent downpours we suffered through. Linus shook his fist at the sky even with thunder and lightening in the area. If you recall, last week, there was a 70% chance of rain for Saturday which not only looked ominous for my Q, but also for the free ticket I had to the Wells Fargo golf tournament. But fate can be fickle and luck would turn for the best and the 70% rain become warm and sunny instead. Whoohooo. There was no holding back on my Weinke now (…that’s what she said!)

Some old but friendly faces gathered in the circle at the GasHouse. Just as we were to begin, here comes Roscoe, Sargento, and Quiche!! all with ruck sacks on. Did Quiche get drugged and not realize he was walking with a weighted backpack? Quick, someone check that cargo load for actual weights and not a few Diet Cokes. It would later become discovered it was the Big Cheese’s birthday, so maybe Quiche was carrying cupcakes. So those two kept on while Roscoe joined the warm-up. A brief disclaimer – proper form rather than speed – you vs. you – simple reminders that us stubborn men have to hear from time to time.

Warm-up – all in cadence, 10 reps:

Imperial Walkers, Toy Soldier, Seal Jacks, Side to Side Lunge, Mtn Climbers, Peter Parker, Parker Peter, Plank Jacks, [walk your feet in to downward dog] CDD’s – once the Mtn Climbers began, we remained in plank – that got the shoulders working and loose. Some were ready for the COT, but there was 50 more minutes to go.

Thang:

Mosey to Grier and line up across the curb facing the gym. We’re going to do some lower body work but we’re going to do it while balancing on the curb which also works your core. Begin with 15 calf raises, flare toes out for 15, turn toes in for 15 more.  Now the challenge of performing squats with your toes on the curb and heels off – this emphasizes your quads and balance – go for 20 OYO. Time for upper body – the Red Reaper – 15 merkins + 30 shoulder taps + 15 merkins. Back to squats for 20, another round of Red Reaper. Taking a brief break, Stroganoff noted he was tired of watching his reflection in the glass windows, so we’ll flip and go heels on the curb for 20 squats and end with a third round of Red Reaper.

Flintstone said he heard a train…so as we mosey out of the parking lot and hit the speed bump, we give 5 burpees for the train. When I got to the steps for cross Garrison, another train (or so I claimed) whistled in the distance – let’s do 5 more burpees. We hustle to the youth hut at the top of the hill. Wall sits waiting for the 6. EZ Rider’s son PickleRick is along with us this morning and at this point likely wishing he’d remain in the fartsack. Once all are present and accounted for, we do Whoopee’s new favorite, Australian Mtn Climbers x 15 followed by 30 Donkey Kicks; recover. We followed that routine two more times. Mosey down the hill toward the ballfield. Upon arrival, Stroganoff says “this is the Short Sale workout I was expecting.” I hope that is a good thing.

At the Q vs. Q Championship, I pulled out the workout and added a few stations. No team competition this day, just an individual station for each PAX with the timer once again being the Murder Bunny and hop over. The other stations were a You vs. You AMRAP:

• 5 Thrusters + 10 Block Curls
• 5 Perfect Form Merkins + 10 Big Boys
• 5 Jump Squats + 10 Mahktar N’Diayes
• 5 Burpees + 10 SSH
• 5 Curls + 10 Shoulder Press
• Monster walks (put a band around your ankles – side step 10 right, 10 left – glutes will feel it)
• 5 Bent Rows + 10 Hammer Curls

We managed to make it through 2 rounds. PickleRick needed CPR to revive him. Each station was clearly marked and there was plenty of light. The mumble chatter was not directed toward the Q nearly like a few weeks ago. This is a full body beatdown that most PAX should have felt the soreness over the weekend.

COT: Prayers: Sargento’s uncle, Flintstone’s parents, Turtleman, Termite’s son, Rachet’s 2.0; Announcements: Annihilation is at GasHouse next week. JJ with the Q and early rumor is running shoes are recommended. See Purple Haze pre-blast on family bike ride/mexican food/arcade. 5/13 CAM food drive help – see Flintstone.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

The forecast for this morning’s running of the Coconut Horse was ominous. Fortunately the temperature was a pleasant 61 degrees at game time and the rain was barely falling, if at all. The rare occurrence that I was 7 minutes early I observed Stroganoff stretching and Gavel getting an early start out of the gate. The rest of the Sum-britches gang arrived right on time. Apparently everyone got the hidden memo to wear neon tops. In this case, “seeing to be seen” is a positive and not just a social media post. At 0630, Stroganoff gets the itch to head out – I shove their bat-flipping boat off the dock as Flintstone’s pre-warm up routine required more muscle rolling.

I roll out of the parking lot with Flintstone – I share that Gavel is already on the course to which he replies “let’s go catch him…” That was not the challenge I was seeking this fine morning. I manage to stick with the svelt First F Q, discussing a variety of topics including the Convergence and Slaw appropriately winning the Belt! (BTW – NC State v. Va Tech is in Blacksburg on November 18th). We hit the bridge entering the greenway and Flintstone hits a stride that he begins gliding over the trail. After the Convergence, I spread 50 bails of pine needles yesterday afternoon and had nothing to offer at that point except watch the vapor trail (not that I would have kept up had I been fully rested and drank rocket fuel either).

Flintstone accomplished his mission to not only catch the neon Sum-britches gang, but Gavel as well. He then circled back for the slow Q and guided me home. Leading from the Six still counts I guess.

QSource – Dichotomy of Leadership which is a great discussion as we have learned through 4 chapters what is the answer? “it depends.” What Jocko and Leif outline are situations where hard decisions must be contemplated. No one enjoys the pressure of difficult decision, especially one that shapes your life. In Ramadi, the SEAL members of Task Unit Bruiser were faced with those pressure situations on a daily basis. In our personal and work lives, the challenges we face are not typically life threatening, but they can still be difficult and unique where one response may be different than the next. Today’s chapter on “When to Mentor, When to Fire” deals with personnel issues of when training or mentorship is not working, and the person is struggling. Jocko shares “most underperformers don’t need to be fired; they need to be led.” How much time do you invest on that person? (a: ‘it depends’) Are they trainable? Is there a different role they should be doing? Or is the Black Tahoe best for all involved? This chapter resembles QSource on Accountability – Team (Q4.8). Today’s group agreed documenting low performance is a necessary tool to cover a leader. Make sure the person understands the “why” and the consequences. We all shared some thoughts and questions, including the true source of “FNG” (Whoopee swears DREDD got it from Forest Gump…).

Prayer requests: Huck, Jane Fonda, the Long family traveling; Announcements: look for pre-blast from Purple Haze about 2nd F bike trip; 5/13 – JJ leads Annihilation at GasHouse – JJ promised a burner – I expect a combination of SA’s physical beatdown with Linus’ mental trickery – should be special.

Happy Birthday Whoopee

If you haven’t heard, I was the Champion in the QvsQ challenge recently. I think all but one person have accepted that honor. Those of you that are golfers will know the British Open winner is crowned with the title Champion Golfer of the Year. I think since the PAX have spoken the same accolade applies here. So with that honor, the 5 PAX that posted this morning Downtown were the beneficiary of what would be a most excellent beatdown. No rookies so we started like this:

Warm-up:

• Seal Jacks IC x 10
• Imperial walkers IC x 10
• Toy Soldiers IC x 10
• Imperial Walkers IC x 10
• Side to Side Lunge IC x 10
• MNC’s IC x 10
• Arrows IC x 10

No need to mosey, we’ll stay under the shelter even though it wasn’t raining. Mary will get some love on the front side. Each exercise was 30 seconds of core work: Leg lifts, American Hammer, Raised Penguin Crunch, Turtle Crunch, 90 Alt Toe Touch, Plank position: R hand to L knee then L hand to R knee; go to elbow plank – hip roll-overs, bank on your six: Genie crunches, elbow to knee then knees to elbows, Heels 2 Heaven, Crunchy Frog, Hollow Hold aka (douche) canoe, and Ski Abs to end. I gave demos where needed but the instructions were clear, so no complaints.

Now let’s mosey to the parking deck. Way back in Round 1 of the QvsQ challenge I uncorked Walk the Plank but the mumble chatter was high and the PAX were not listening well. My 5 students were curious and attentive – much easier to communicate the plan which requested they find a parking spot on the wall side of the deck. At the beginning of the parking lot line do 10 HR Merkins then Joe Hendricks along the parking line toward the wall. Stop and do 10 Donkey Kicks. Then plank-walk left toward the other side of the parking spot. Stop and do 10 Australian Mtn Climbers. Then bear crawl along the line to the left side opening. That completes the square and by now the shoulders are feeling it a bit. So, let’s go two more rounds.

To give a break to our upper body, we went back to the core with 20 LBC’s, 20 Raised Penguin Crunches, and 20 Ski Abs.

Moving on – PAX still listening to what instructions I have. No challenges, how nice it can be sometimes to enjoy this fine group of gentlemen. We’ll use the levels of the parking deck for a 4 level escalator instead of 4 corner. Round 1, Level 1: 5 burpees – run to Level 4, descend the stairs. Round 2: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips – run to level 4, descend the stairs. Round 3: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips, Level 3: 20 jump squats, run to level 4, descend the stairs. Round 4: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips, Level 3: 20 jump squats, Level 4: 40 merkins, descend the stairs.

At this time we had 8 minutes left so I offered the PAX a choice – run it back or head back for more Mary. Purple Haze said option C – stop at the wall at the condos on MLK for some wall sits and dirty hook-ups. Seuss selected wall sits with marching and arm extension varieties. We hustled back to the pavilion and did flutters and big boys until time.

COT: Prayers for Stephanie (Pallbearers niece) that is dealing with cancer diagnosis; Stephanie – Watt’s Up teammate dealing w/ health issues; Ratchet’s 2.0, Huck, and Gump (Seuss visited with him yesterday and he learned of his sentence). Announcements: 2F lunch in Dallas this upcoming Wednesday, Flash relay (see Flintstone), 4/29 Convergence at Midoriyama 0700.

The rain held and we stayed dry – I guess some Q’s have that kind of command on the weather. The attendees bought into the instruction and supported the instruction to receive a core focused workout that will only benefit them. Thanks to those men to enjoy the fellowship. Oddly Pallbearer was the only under 50 PAX, hence the title.

Until the next one – thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

Champion Q of the Year

Pregame: If you watched UCONN win the National Championship Monday night or for that matter, any Final Four in the past 20 years, you may have recognized one of the scripts on the sideline “The Road Ends Here.” It serves as a statement for the journey of 68 teams trying to reach the pinnacle of college basketball. So too could that expression lend itself to 2023 F3 Gastonia’s March Madness Tournament. A brilliant idea that began as a gleam in Flintstone’s First F mind. As a fan of creativity, I applaud the concept, as did most of the PAX judging by the elevated attendance for each match up. Hat’s off to Flintstone. If you’ve been under a rock this version of a tournament came together after the PAX were surveyed to identify the top 8 Q’s. There was no specific criteria for voting. As Sister Act declared, it’s a popularity contest. Possibly, but judging by the contestants, the 8 men bring their brand of Q to each workout that may have separated themselves in some way. The order was: Freight, YHC, Sister Act, Roscoe, Broke, Whoopee, Balljoint, and Wirenut. Due to some scheduling conflicts, the matchups didn’t quite match up as they would in normal seeding. As the tournament progressed, it came down to #1 vs. #2 at Folsom on Aprils Fools Day. Here is a bit about how it went.

Gameday: Actually, Friday night before Gameday. As I knew I would be in NOGA where Freight returned after trying to live the uppity life in Belmont, I thought best to make an appearance at the Rusty Rabbit Happy Hour. It’s been quite a while since I even made it to the Belmont Bottoms Up and I’d never made it to Dallas. Time to press the flesh and maybe buy a vote or two. I walk in the door to see Freight had the same idea. The Mayor (who was hunting Saturday and not able to vote) along with Def Leppard. Gumby came along later. I bought a round anyway, even bought Freight a Leinenkugel (which maybe the Belmont hasn’t quite left him yet – I wonder if the barkeep at the Rabbit knew they even had that brand). We kept the conversation polite. Afterwards, I headed over to Folsom to do some reconnaissance.

Freight had selected to go first in his two matches, but as a bit of gamesmanship, he deferred to me on this morning. I sensed something and after some thought realized Folsom began at 0630. My workout would almost be entirely in the dark. Well played sir. Only I solved that problem with a generator and some floodlights, well sort of – to the best that I could get the lights to show. As I completed my set up Saturday morning I complimented my opponent on his strategy. Thankfully at Q-Source, we studied Jocko’s Extreme Ownership and Chapter 9 is Plan – very resourceful – I highly recommend it. As the clocked ticked toward 0630, I handed out F3 wristbands and placed stickers on the PAX so I could easily divide them into teams of 5 which was necessary for my workout. We had over 30 men arrive. Flintstone gave instructions and turned it over to me – no warm-up, let’s mosey.

First Half: we arrive in the traditional parking lot of Folsom by the tennis court and the soccer field. I stop at my generator to flip on the lights that spotlighted two rows of stakes with signs identifying exercises. Now for the challenge to explain to the herded cats.  Everyone was split in teams of 5 which would align to the lanes I had established with 5 stations for each PAX to rotate through. My Q Fail was I didn’t identify the team’s sections which was made more complicated in the limited light. I did my best to place the groups at their spots and since we had 32, assigned me and another PAX to join a team and mirror someone. I of course mirrored Freight – best to keep a close eye and diffuse any mumble chatter. The stations were:

1. Thrusters x 5 and Block Curls x 10
2. Perfect Form HR Merkins x 5 and Big Boys x 10
3. Murder Bunny 15 yds + 10 Hop Overs + Murder Bunny 15 yds to return (Timer)
4. Jump Squats x 5 and Mahktar N’Diayes x 10
5. Burpees x 5 and SSH x 10

Station 3 was the timer so however long it took that teammate to execute, Stations 1, 2, 4, & 5 would perform the 2 exercise set as many times as possible. Because the PAX enjoy competing, I bought a bunch of plastic Easter eggs to use as points. Every time a circuit was completed, the PAX tossed an egg in their team’s bucket. This was done to push all the PAX at all stations so they could hold up their end for the team. Standing around to catch your breath mean less eggs in the bucket, or so it was to be. Q Fail #2 – I should have bought more eggs (or devised a different scoring system). It was organized chaos, but I intended to begin with a difficult workout which was based on an Iron PAX version that I modified for this event. It was designed to test the men which it seemed to do. Team #4 was declared the winner.

After about 15 minutes, it was time to move on for Thang #2. Now I’d have to dig through some of my work notebooks to show you the time this idea formulated. Safe to say it’s been a year or so before the Pandemic or as all of us in F3 Gastonia recall the year Def Leppard tried to shut us down. But I digress…in the back of my work notebooks, when I get an idea for a workout, I sketch it out. I’ve waited for the right situation to break out the Tennis Workout. Today was the day. Simple, fun and effective. Write down an exercise or two on a ball. The ball gets smacked down the court, the PAX chase it and do a declared number of reps. They bring the ball back and have another one hit. Kind of like playing fetch with your dog. Originally, I wanted a tennis ball machine that would shoot out balls like a cannon, but I couldn’t find one to borrow. I recalled the PAX enjoyed my bartenders so much when I whooped SA with the Beer Workout, I invited Turtleman, Christine (his M) and Nancy (his neighbor) back for the main event. It helps Christine and Nancy are high level USTA players and they certainly look the part. After about 5 or 6 rounds of that, my time was done.

Second Half: Freight hurried the group back to the soccer field requesting each PAX grab a concrete block on their way. He had set up cones on the sideline and middle of the field width. I have to admit, pretty simple, but by this point, the sun was rising and he had plenty of light – who couldn’t do this? He gave instructions that each set would be timed and the penalty for be 1 burpee for each PAX that did not cross the finish line by the specified time. This would be tested quickly. The first set began with a murder bunny to midfield, leave the block, sprint to the other sideline and return in the time limit. Most made it and we may have had a 3 burpee penalty. I could take you through the remaining 13 rounds that were on the Weinke (loser shares their Weinke, winner writes the backblast, consider yourself lucky as an award winning Backblast writer – BAM! there’s another award Freight hasn’t won! – Freight better start picking up the 6). So, I’ll highlight a few details of this Q. Admittedly, we did some sprinting which does up the heart rate, but there were a whole lot of 10 counts, and I do mean a LOT! After a few of these rounds, this workout looked eerily similar to Freight’s first round match against Broke. Sure we did a few Murder Bunnys and some block work, but still had the same burpee per man penalty…doesn’t sound very creative to me. I will give it to Freight, next to Tool Time, Freight is the Prince of Mumble Chatter and my full intention was to give that chatter back as much as I could. So with a 10 count occurring after each return, seemed like a lot of standing around to me…I attempted to take over the Q. Freight quickly countered by shouting instructions and something about my portion being a FIA workout (note, the ladies were eye candy, not workout instructors or partners). One of the exercises, over 20 PAX missed the time requirement, so the Q quickly Omahaed dialing back from the 1 burpee per man to a static 10 count (don’t do it if you can’t Q it!). An exasperated Freight requested Slaw provide a German 10 Count. At this point it was fair to say Slaw was Co-Q-ing the workout. Most PAX, in particular Sparky were not abiding by Freight’s signal to drop the green flag, instead running well ahead of the word “Go” and no one, in particular Def Leppard participated in the burpee penalty. It got so disorderly Broke just up and left (he confessed he would have voted for me anyway). Most PAX were begging for something creative to happen but Slaw kept charging ahead with Freight’s Weinke. Finally, Father Time finally gained the advantage to call this segment and have us mosey back to the flag.

Postgame: At the circle, I took the opportunity to share refreshments with my brothers. Beer for those that wanted it and water for the rest. I also awarded Team 4 with Starbucks gift cards. Yes, votes can be bought. Now I knew I was up against a decidedly homefield advantage, but there were enough friendly faces that maybe would vote based upon effort or bribes. As the cards were distributed, Freight took an early lead. It did not look pretty for yours truly, but like election night, we know California is going blue, so let’s ride this thing out. About midway, I made some ground and then it got tight, like a pair of Sunday pants after Easter brunch. With only a few votes left, the card with “Murder Bunnies” was announced – Flintstone shuffled it to the bottom of the stack. A few more votes went my way and now we were dead even with the last remaining unnamed card. Flintstone said “someone needs to identify their vote…” A moment of silence as we waited and the former Nantan stepped forward and claimed the card, but now he had the deciding vote. The entire tournament champion rested in Sargento’s hands. Much like 1983 when Derek Whittenburg heaved up a shot toward the basket. Would this prayer be answered? Your damn right it was – BAM – just like Lorenzo Charles slammed home a Wolfpack win, baby! Finally, being part of the Wolfpack paid off. Thanks brother. Go Pack! We have a winner!

Announcements: Whitewater relay race – see Flintstone; Prayers: Ratchet’s 2.0, Flintstone’s father’s treatment, Huck, Turtleman, and others.

Moleskin: First, it’s an honor to be selected to compete in this event. Second, I appreciate all that particpated. Whether you voted for me or not, the size of the PAX and respect for each opponent certainly provided the challenge. If you’re still with me on this novel, I’ll share a truth. Freight may be #2 among the PAX but I voted Freight #1 on my ballot. I also had SA, Broke, Roscoe, and Whoopee listed as well. Obviously, I’m in a majority of PAX that agree those guys bring a solid Q and if I had more votes, Balljoint and Wirenut would be there too. All bring something different, and that is what make our brotherhood of Freed to Lead a great test of leadership. I’ll admit to being a bit of a Q snob, but when I see Freight’s name on the schedule, I try to attend as I know it will be a test. It may be one that I suffer through, but I know the workout was well planned. He was a worthy opponent. I think I enjoyed the gamesmanship as much as the event itself. I may have even planted a fake Weinke for him to find when cleaning out the van after the P200.

Work has been crazy busy as I’m part of a project implementation going in phases from now to July. If I wasn’t thinking about work or family, my mind was on each round of the workout. I know my stuff is complicated, but rest assured each element was thought through. I appreciate the grace of you guys to entertain my type of workout whether it’s in this format or just a regular gloomy morning. Hopefully in due time you’ll think back on this one for the tennis ball or maybe the easter egg scoring system – if it left an impression (and some soreness) then I did my job.

There is no way I could have done this on my own. I had plenty of input from friends that gave solid advice. They know who they are. I also need to thank Turtleman, his M Christine and Nancy who were happy to participate in two of my Q’s. (For those curious, Christine is the blonde and Nancy is the tall one). Let me know if I need to recruit them for a future event. A handful of guys stuck around to clear the field and Ash Pond helped me return the blocks. Thanks to all of you that helped.

Finally, I’ve reached the End of the Road. It’s a good thing because I’m not sure what tricks I had for another workout. Hell, who are we kidding? I’ll come up with something, Until the next time, thanks for allowing me to lead.

Short Sale

Semi-Final of QvQ was set for Downtown with YHC matched against a younger whipper snapper, Balljoint. This would be much different than the quarter finals vs. SA for several reasons. #1, a weekday workout with only 20 minutes to fill and the standard 0530 start; #2, Balljoint is well liked, so I did not have pocket votes for douchyness; #3) BJ is creative, I support that criteria; and #4) Downtown may as well be a satellite AO for Folsom as it is often well attended by the bearded truck driving PAX. So how do I top the quarter final workout with kegs, cases of beer, and women bartenders? I’m not sure I can, but I had several ideas and began refining during the week. While the idea was clear in my head (don’t they all seem good on paper?), as I shared with a few folks, their initial reaction told me I could be in trouble. Uh, oh, not a good sign. Roscoe suggested a pre-blast, but I didn’t want to give away the idea. As you well know, the element of unknown at a workout is part of what makes this crazy thing work. I went with a limited concept of “Pre-Instructions” which drew expected push-back. But at this point, I was committed to the concept and it would be the sword that I either died on or raised in victory.

Friday morning, 0927 zulu time, PAX begin arriving to the base of the Rotary Pavillion. My workout is heavily dependent on the number of attendees, but more on that in a minute. I begin doing a series of head counts as I greet the PAX. I notice new names and faces, likely Folsom men – I’ve got my work cut out for me. We get to about 20 men and I feel strong about the division of teams necessary for the workout. Flintstone begins giving instructions. More men jogging to the circle, but I see several vehicles headlight beams streaming into the parking lot. The circle expands. I quickly go around for another headcount. Part of leadership is changing on the fly but sticking with the strategy. Ok, teams will be of 6 instead of 5. It’s now time and I begin the greeting, more PAX coming. I gave SA hell the week before about not saying the Pledge at the start. So we do that first because we’re America and we’re #1. More people have arrived. Ok, teams of 7 – getting worried. I wish Balljoint good luck because we’ve been keeping it classy all week and he’s a good dude. Let’s warm-up, Side Straddle Hops on my count, in cadence, ready position move: “one-two-three-One! Done” Let’s go. In my excitement, I literally stumble out of the gate and almost eat brick. That would have sucked, but I managed to hang on and get going. We ran to the Parking Deck for the big reveal of the childhood game: Connect Four. Instead of 7 columns & rows, I had 5 on my board. I’m going to attempt to explain this on paper so stick with me. As the PAX came into the deck I grouped them into four teams. More late arriving PAX are with us…now I’m at 8 per team, I think. Too late to adjust – gotta run with that.

The teams were assigned colors: Team Yellow vs. Team Blue, Team Red vs. Team Green and there would be parallel competitions. Each row on the board had 5 slots to correspond to a level in the parking deck. You need to have a foundation to build on put a chip on rows 2, 3, 4, or 5. The PAX would grab their colored folder on each level and select one of the blocks that contained two exercises and a total number of reps for the team to complete. For example:

• Side Straddle Hops – 125 total reps (single count)
• Flutter Kicks – 120 total reps (Count one leg only)

Here is where I mis-calculated (there is always a Q-fail in each workout, the secret is not letting the PAX know it at the time); the fail was the total team reps were calculated based on teams of 5. With teams of 8, it did not take long to complete the required number. Now, since I have your brief attention, the next time I do this work out, (I do think it has potential), note that if a bat flipper does 40 and the other teammates do 30, 20, 18 & 17, that’s within the rules. You could also have half the team do SSH’s and half complete flutters. I knew the instructions would be challenging to communicate, especially with the size of the group. Hopefully a few got it and would help the others catch on. The concept behind this organized chaos was exactly that: organized chaos. Who among the team would lead the charge? Who would focus on the strategy of placing the chip on the board? Because the teams were required to travel as ONE, no man was left behind. Now have 32 guys running all over the parking deck at the same time, yes, it was chaotic. In the end

Maybe some of the attendees gave some thought to the game or maybe you’re like, it’s a workout, I got more important things to do (as you should), but if you did, all four teams had the same strategy which was to go as fast as they could to get a chip on each level – essentially, out-race the other team. What I thought would happen, is one team would choose a defensive approach to place their chip as a “block” on the board and impact the other team’s purpose. Maybe next time. Unlikely the PAX looked at the 25 different circuits created in the book, but as the parking deck level went up, so did the challenge in the workouts (SA). And as mentioned, had I forecasted a better number of PAX, it would have pushed the teams more. Hey, but you do what you do.

So we finished early and that gave me time for some Mary which I hit a number of exercises in quick succession, getting to the famous Baby Makers which most PAX agreed after 10 reps, they were shot.

Notice how Team Blue attempted to cheat by putting a blue chip on the 3rd row w/o having a base chip on Row 2. If they had completed the exercise ahead of Team Yellow’s row 3, they could have blocked. Or they could have gone to Row 4 and blocked. Missed opportunity.

Balljoint Time – he takes over and runs to the corner of South Marietta/Franklin – Seal Jacks for the 6; we quickly move south another block, round the corner and stop in the middle of Second Ave. Balljoint says – this is real simple (he got me on that one), Triple Nickel, ‘Balljoint Style’ which for the non-Folsom crowd mean WTH? Evidently Balljoint Style means instead of 5 reps on the ends, you perform 10 – my Man! Way to “shortsale” that Q, we’re back on even ground, sort of. This routine has half the PAX running east to a handrail to perform 10 Australian Pull-ups, run east to the South/Second Ave intersection for 10 Perfect Form Merkins. When you cross the equator line, make it dirty and perform 5 jump squats with some type of ballerina thingy with your arms. Balljoint called it something that I can’t recall and I’m not throwing shade – I just don’t know what it was called. Not sure if it met SA’s double-black diamond standard. Maybe he can share his workout results and heartrate? We made 3 or 4 rounds before Balljoint Omahaed and had us head north on South Street – doing Seal Jacks waiting on Wirenut before crossing Franklin. Arriving at Main Street, he called 5 burpees (because it isn’t a workout if you don’t do burpees).  We arrived back to base.

I headed to my vehicle for the trusty cooler. Even though it was St. Patrick’s day and I had plenty of beer, I didn’t get any takers. Thankfully I had Gatorade and Water. Upon my return, I noticed not only did BJ have his cooler of drinks (I expected that, actually offered to go halfsies and got no response), but there were several boxes of Bojangles sausage biscuits. Dammit!!! Well played Balljoint. Future P200 teammate Sparky was called in for that part of BJ’s plan. Votes were cast and I got out of the gate about like my (and Balljoint’s) Wolfpack did against Creighton yesterday. Balljoint built a nice collection of index cards. As the disparity reached 12-5, I began thinking of a concession speech. But then Flintstone handed me a vote, and another and another. Did George Soros just show up with a bag full of votes?? Did Putin flip the switch on the electronic ballot counters? Something happened and I got on a heater. We drew even at 14 with one final card in Flintstone’s hand. He then handed it to me. 15-14 was the tally and I was lucky to have good support and maybe sold a few guys on the circus I brought to town. Thanks to the 30 PAX that came out to support this workout (not to non-attendee, Flintstone abstained from voting and Sparky didn’t cast since he just brought bribes). Now it is officially on to the final round where I will battle Freight for all the glory our region has to offer.  I hope you’ll make plans to attend. I assure it will be worth your while.

Prayer Requests: Ratchet’s 2.0 battling cancer; Pallbearer mentioned a young lady that took her life – prayers for that family. Pray for each other and the individual battles we face. Lean on each other for support. Announcements: Blood drive at Twisted Sugar, Belmont on 4/1 from 10-3 pm; Extinction Run presented check to Strong like AK last night at Primal.

QvQ will take a hiatus next week as we have some relays to run. Freight and I are in the same van next weekend – I wonder if QvQ topic will be discussed. So as of this moment, the finals will be hosted at Folsom on April 1st, presumably at 0630. More discussion I’m sure will follow in the upcoming days ahead. One of the Core Principles of F3 is Peer led, which I embrace the concept. I’ll leave you with this. What I have planned has been on the drawing board for about 3 years now. I’ll work on the edges and hopefully make it competitive with Freight’s Q. When you look back to recall a favorite workout, is it one where you did the same old same old? Or is it one that had a little flair? Like a wrestling theme (tag team partner Roscoe), golf, beer or bartenders? If that happens to be your cup of tea, you won’t be disappointed. But in case you are, let me know what kind of biscuits, coffee or beer you prefer. As the commercial sorta goes, beating Freight: priceless, for everything else, including votes, there’s MasterCard. Feel free to DM me your needs.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

The final matchup of Flintstone’s inaugural creation occurred at the GasHouse with a healthy crowd of eager attendees. Much like our political world in recent years, it seemed some men showed to vote against one candidate possibly more than for the other. We are fortunate as Americans to live in a democracy where our right to vote can be cast on whatever criteria we choose. As F3 men, we are truly Freed to Lead as our guide manual is titled. Coupled with one of the principles that each workout is Peer led, that element paints unique pictures for us not only to observe but participate as well.

First, it is an honor to have been selected among this elite group. I really have not Q’ed much in the past year, so my reputation of past performance likely carried some weight among the preliminary round. Once the matchups were set and due to some scheduling conflicts, I ended up against Sister Act. Truth be told, SA was one of my 5 nominees. Despite his general douchyness, his workouts are always a challenge in the simplistic choice of exercises. We love to give him a hard time for his limited Weinke but if you push through it, you will be smoked, no doubt about it. Strategically, I deferred my Q to the 2nd half. Partly because SA pre-accused me of a douche move to not identify the changeover location. Easy problem to solve – I graciously invited SA to go first. To my surprise, he actually led a warm-up with 10 reps of SSH, 5 burpees, 10 x Hillbillies, 5 burpees, and 10 x Gravel pickers. He gruffed “let’s go.” As Site Q at the GasHouse, we typically say the pledge at that point. As we moseyed over to the library, whether by reminder or intent, we paused for the pledge. I guess SA does love our country.

SA began with a circuit that included Big Boys, merkins, Imperial Walker Squats, and Burpees (you knew there’d be burpees) then run around the book drop-off circle. When you returned, perform Seal Jacks or pick up the 6 until the six was in. The first round was 5, followed by 10, and then to 20. SA took notes as to who got the six as that is a medal award at the yearend Christmas party. Freight has apparently set his sights to add that award to his collection. During about round 2, Slaw straddled SA during the merkins to give some Navy love to our Q. It was one of those memories you can’t unsee. If you were absent, be glad for this reason. We then moved to what SA called Iron Plank or something he claims to have created. A ratio of 1:4 Mike Tyson (you knew these would be included) to Mtn Climber. The Q said “on my count” which ended up being a fleeting glimpse of his leadership. Somewhere after round 4, there was no more “iron” in this as SA took breaks between each exercise, resting on his knees and adding Moroccan Night Clubs. This even became too much iron for our leader as he was so winded his cadence became inaudible. Thankfully Pockets picked up for the Q because we were going to 10 MT’s and 40 MC’s or else. Many opted out at this point which is probably why SA got so few votes. With a few minutes left, SA “created” another new combination to perform Route 66 Merkin/Bear Crawl something-or-other. We began at the bottom of the parking lot and slowly worked our way up to maybe 7-10-ish reps? SA had lost complete control at that point with steady mumble chatter affecting any ability to lead. Buzzer sounded!!

Time for me to take the reins of this sled. We moseyed to the front parking lot of First Presbyterian Church where a circle formed and I acknowledged the work completed, but if they could give me whatever effort they had in the tank, we’d push through my brand of Q. Admittedly, my Q’s are not the most difficult. In the attempt to be creative, I realize I tend to overcomplicate at times (the hell you say??, not really, I do…) but I always have a purpose.  Either to target a particular body group or purpose of the Weinke. To ease into this thing, let’s do some core-cardio. On the timer was 25 seconds for each exercise with NO rest between:

• Burpees (because SA says it’s not a true w/o unless you have burpees – box checked)
• 4×4 (4 merkins+4 Mtn. Climbers, stand up, repeat) I counted these out loud for all to hear without getting winded, maybe that got me a vote?
• Squat Jack Twist – yes, like a dance move but good cardio; feel free to get jiggy with it at your next Q
• Crunchy Frogs – groans from the PAX – that’s a good thing
• Jump Squats – PAX hate these too (I’m doing something right)
• Turtle Crunch – I’m likely the only one to include this so had to demo, you should try it
• Goof Ball – in honor of former Nantan – Sargento (secured another vote there)
• American Hammer – because America > Russia
• Alternating Lunge Jumps – yes – in F3, these are called Bonnie Blairs – thanks for paying attention
• Ski Abs – insanity move that Freight and I are the few to employ this cardio-core burner

Next up was something I had done previously but with a much smaller and quiet audience. It was a Q fail on my part. But you know how politicians will sometimes step in “it” causing their teams to perform damage control? That was this routine. This is one of those occasions that it looked good on paper. I asked the PAX to find their own parking spot (this was a challenge in and of itself). At the bottom of the space, do 5 HR Merkins. Bear Crawl forward to the curb, 5 Mtn Climbers, Plank Walk right for Plank Jacks, Joe Hendrix back to the other side of the space for 5 Mike Tysons. Poorly executed by the Q and I realized the train was getting off the tracks…let’s move the Main Event.

Rounding the corner was my elaborate set up with a party tent acting as Short Sale’s Tavern of Torture. I had coupons in the form of 6 empty kegs and 8 cases of beer. For this special occasion, I contracted some bartenders to assist me. Our prayers have been for Turtleman in an enduring battle. If his attitude and fight can’t inspire you, nothing else will. This was an opportunity for him to be engaged with an F3 event and while Turtleman is a nice looking fellow, I needed some eye candy.  Hooters isn’t making millions of dollars just for their chicken wings and beer pitchers. So Turtleman’s M Christine and another friend Nancy were my bartenders to handout menus for the PAX. What’s on the menu you are now wondering? Well first, let me further explain, in the parking lot, spaced at the end of two islands and in the middle of the islands were 7 stations, aka “bars” named after the other QvQ participants:

• Freight’s Mad Dog Saloon
• Ball Joint’s Bud Light Garage
• Whoopee’s Honky Tonk
• Broke’s Sour Grapes Wine & Cheese Bistro
• Roscoe’s ‘Coon and Cocktail
• WireNut’s Gates of Hell Biker Bar and Fightery
• Sister Act’s Lonely Hearts Lounge

This effort required partners to team up, go to my bar and request a menu which my lovely assistants would give them a menu – no trading out unless you were willing to drink a beer penalty. The menu stated if a coupon was needed. It directed them to a designated “bar” for a set of exercises that were all familiar and needed no further explanation. Most menu’s required multiple stops along the circular route. Once the menu (i.e. circuit) was completed, return your card and get another one. Goal was to complete 3 rounds. In total, there were 18 different workouts on the cards. Despite SA trying to stir the chatter, for this part of the workout, my instructions were clear. There were 4 levels of workouts:

• Lightweight
• Buzzed
• Piss Ass Drunk
• and Blackout (“Call an Uber”)

I intentionally paired with SA and Doodles as we had an odd number of PAX. SA complained the first round wasn’t as hard as his. True, but there were a mix of workouts, so for Round 2 we stepped up with this 3 bar circuit that had 5 burpees, 10 werkins, and 20 squats at each station. SA complained of his knee hurting and having to back it down. The other circuit worth mentioning was the Beer Mile, except it was only 0.15/mile and each PAX had to drink 2 beers. The overall winners were Slaw and Pockets who selected one of the cases/coupon’s as their prize. With only a few minutes remaining, we bid our bartender’s farewell. I offered Roadies of beer and/or water which some of the PAX accepted my bribe to enjoy along their return to base.

Once back at the Schiele, the PAX voted via notecards. Would they prefer the double black diamond or the creative effort? On SLACK, SA had forecasted the event would be similar to my Wolfpack’s ACC game against Clemson – a competitive first half followed by the Pack’s fizzle in the second to lose big. Fortunately I escaped the curse known as #StateShit and the PAX enjoyed my Q significantly more than SA to the tune of 16 to 6 (one PAX voted for Freight). Winner, winner, chicken dinner. And fortunately for you, the backblast was written in a little over 24 hours; another vote for me.

Prayer requests: Flintstone’s dad beginning radiation treatment. Announcements: Speed 4 Need at the Community Foundation Run – tell Broke if you are pushing. Relay running event at the Whitewater Center – see Flinstone. I took us out in prayer.

Moleskin: Thanks to Flintstone for creating this event. It has definitely increased the attention in what may have been a “normal” workout. I’ve participated in 3 of the 4 matches and all have been well attended. Each Q has brought their best effort. Being on the home turf at the GasHouse made it comfortable for me. Sister Act tends to draw the negative mumble chatter and I had a few votes in my pocket before the workout began. At least for this round, my effort was noticed by the majority of the PAX. The coupons and elaborate grandeur bought me a few votes, as did the free beer. I spent a good chunk of my week, including a half day off to plan everything. But a win over SA are bragging rights that will last a lifetime, someone remember to put that on my tombstone.

Now it’s on to the semi-finals where I’ll match efforts against Ball Joint. A man after my own heart who provides beer bribes as well. Looks like I’ll have to dig into my toy box of creativity. I hope you’ll join us Friday morning at Downtown where you can first hand experience the workout for yourself. I will give my best effort not to disappoint. Until the next one, thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale 16

Sister Act 6

Following the Extinction Run, a good group of guys gathered at 0630 in the Harris Teeter Parking lot. Most had their ruck sacks  intending for a recovery exercise. All except one. Stroganoff fresh off completing 13 (I think?) miles at the Extinction Run put two fingers on the “f-ck it” button and pressed hard cashing in another 5 miles. JJ joined him. The rest of us took what has become a staple route into Heatherloch so Scratch (Hunchback’s pup) can burn some energy before drop off at his house on the return. BOS and Flintstone lead the way. The rest of us grouped together.

We returned inside the HT for QSource, Chapter 9 of Extreme Ownership’s Plan written by Leif Babin. They used a rescue mission of a hostage as the premise for the lesson. Proper planning begins with mission analysis and directives for the team. The plan must be understood on all levels. Leadership must be briefed clearly and concisely but the boots on the group teammates must be empowered and know the roles well enough to execute which may include covering for someone else if necessary. Once the mission/project is complete, a debrief can identify relative strengths and weaknesses to improve for the future.

Until the next one:

Short Sale

Saturday at the GasHouse was intended to be a ruck/run tour of nearby neighborhoods to market our Saturday workout to the locals. Upon recognizance, I learned 90% of the mailboxes are by the front door. In this day and age of video cameras, ring doorbells, and respect for privacy, Hunchback and I reconsidered the plan. Instead we’ll go with standard signage to hopefully recruit some new FNGs. So, Plan B, let’s go with a lowerbody focused bootcamp. Knowing Boudin and Stroganoff were nursing back injuries, I thought that might be helpful. One man accepted the challenge and one was not quite ready. At 0700 the circle formed with some good old 2nd F chatter. Observing a veteran crew I went right into it without hesitation.

SSH IC x 30, Imperial Walkers IC x 10, Toy Soldier IC x 10, Side to Side Butt Kicks IC x 10, THE patented left over right IC followed by THE patented right over left IC, MNC’s IC x 10. I think I was done after that. The groups split with 7 men following me out of the parking lot to the First Presbyterian Youth Building (aka The PAD).

The Q fairy had been there already to tape signage to the walls and drop coupons. Under the sheltered porch and around the building were 10 stations:

• Monster Walks – use a band, lateral step 15 right and return 15 left
• Dead Lifts – straight leg, 15 reps (grab a weight)
• Goblet Squats x 15
• Kettlebell Swings x 15
• Staggered Squat – 8 right, 8 left (grab a weight or ruck sack)
• Bulgarian Squat R x 15, (grab sandbags, single or multiple dumbbells)
• Bulgarian Squat L x 15 (grab sandbags, single or multiple dumbbells)
• Alternating Step Back Lunch – 8 right, 8 left (use weights)
• Glute Bridges x 15
• Hamstring Curls – sit on flat bench and use power band

After each exercise, PAX runs to the bottom of the stairs and returns to do a new exercise. Amid criticism and insults, I executed a run-through. Reps are at 15 so a premium could be placed on proper form. As the PAX spread out to get started “BOOM!” Boudin sits on the bench for hamstring curls and snaps the power band on the 2nd rep. I severely underestimated his raw power. His soccer legs are jacked up like the HULK, except their not green. All this rucking and walking, Boudin’s quads are bigger than Saquan Barkley. Despite Boudin F-ing up the stations, an experience Q improvised to announce, “we’ll now have 9 stations – thanks Boudin!”

I had intended for 3 total circuits but had not timed this, so we only completed 2-ish circuits. This kept the PAX together so there was plenty of conversation, accusations, insults and the like. Anytime legs are worked, it expedites the calorie burn. The Monster Walks are a challenge – if you have an individual band, try it at home (maybe not Boudin…he may need a fireman’s hose as a band for his tree trunk legs).

We had about 20 minutes remaining, and I had promised some core work. Sargento was very excited at this news as he had been improvising much of this workout thus far. We relocated to the back parking lot for a 4-corner stack.

1. 10 Crunches (not LBCs, real big-boy crunches)
2. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutter Kicks
3. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutter Kicks + 30 Freddie Mercs
4. 10 Crunches + 20 Flutters + 30 FM + 40 American Hammer

Now for round deuce – this is like a Big Mac, we’re double stacking. Keep the same 4 exercises and the reps (i.e. Set 1) at each corner, now add:

1. Circuit 1 + 10 Leg Raises
2. Circuit 1 + 10 Leg Raises + 20 Heels to Heaven

We ran out of time and headed back to base. If that wet your appetite (or other body part), I’ll work it into my next Q. Someone reminded me we had yet to recite the Pledge, so took care of that. Announcements: Extinction Run 3/4, Convergence at Folsom at 6:30 on 2/4, 2nd F Lunch at Hillbillies. Prayer Requests: Huck, Turtleman, Clavin’s M and I’m forgetting some. Sargento took us out.

Next time you see Boudin check out his massive legs. You won’t be disappointed.