Author: Short Sale (Page 4 of 20)

The initial shovel flag was planted in March 2015 for our region. We began to grow and expand. Along the way we’ve impacted a number of me, mostly in a positive way, though I’m sure a few in a negative manner, if we’re being honest (TBH as the kids say these days). In the early years, some dad’s brought their young boys to some of the workouts. One (Smalls) even led a workout (it was pretty good if memory serves). Yesterday was Father’s Day, which we take time to recognize men that brought us into the world, providing guidance and usually serving as a role model to shape our lives. So this morning, as our pre-game circle gathered, a youthful figure emerged, though he’s much bigger now. None other than one of Squirt’s twin boys: Papa-Johns. Same smile on his face as I remember about 5 years ago. Papa-Johns is now 16 and able to drive to the workout. Why did you drive himself? Because Papa-Johns beat the fartsack and Squirt didn’t. That’s ok – maybe now Papa-Johns will put the EH on his dad this time. Nice to have you back young fella.

Warm-Up: All IC x 10: Seal Jacks, Imperial Walkers, Toy Soldiers, Side to Side Lunges, Arrows, and some squat flingy thing I came up with to warm up the shoulders a big more (because they were gonna get ‘werked). Pledge, mosey.

Thang: we arrived at the parking lot of Planet Fitness. Whoopee was still heartbroken that Stroganoff called nary a one hip slapper Saturday. You see Whoopee wanted flex his muscle in front of his future son-in-law “Jackpot.” Okay – not quite son in law – but serious boyfriend. When the M says be kind to him, she’s already taking a shine to this guy so anyway – Whoopee needed to get this out of his system.

Against the wall – 10 hip slappers, bear crawl to the parking median, 15 merkins, run to the end of the parking lot, 5 burpees – do this for 3 rounds. Dying cockroaches waiting for the 6. Time to share a story from Fathers Day – Roscoe talked about dinner with his family at LongHorns and then a Honey Hunters baseball game. Good stuff.

Mosey through Food Lion to the Dollar General. Just to be douchy – Triple Nickel: Jump Squats and Mike Tysons. Oh yeah – someone sitting in their AT&T truck is nodding their head – you know you like it! More time for Father’s Day stories – Nutria shared his kids put him on a scavenger hunt for candy. Some others I can’t recall.

Mosey over to Gastone’s Hill (doesn’t Gastone need to post sometime or else we re-name this thing? your call). Let’s NUR up the hill and every 2nd mailbox, drop and do 5 plank jacks – more burn if you face downhill. Flintstone beat me to the top, I called Omaha at the first cross street. We did 50 LBCs OYO. Down the hill, running forward this time – every 3rd mailbox do 5 shoulder taps. At the bottom, some called Al Gore, the Q didn’t and ignored the mutiny. One more Father’s Day story  or two. Let’s go back to base. At Riverwood Trail, stop for squats. Q checks watch – plenty of time – we’ll go the long way, down the hill and through the trail to the park. Stop for core work: 20 flutters, 20 Freddie mercury, 20 American hammers. We had about 5 minutes left. As we began the mosey home, Amazon suggested pull-ups. So as a time-waster, I stopped at the pull-up bar and said 50 burpees unless our Nantan could execute a perfect form pull up. Roscoe asked which grip we preferred him to use – I said your choice. Roscoe hung briefly then easily maneuvered up the bar and held his pose. Ok – now 25 burpees or someone else step to the plate for 1 pull-up. Secretly I was rooting for Papa John’s to show off but JJ grabbed it instead. The PAX were saved by Roscoe and JJ. Good thing Whoopee didn’t get on it b/c he was ready to sabotage the PAX and NOT do a pull up so the PAX would need to do burpees. We migrated to the parking lot as time expired.

COT: Prayers for Ratchet and 2.0, Norwood, praise for Anchorman’s Sister in Law. Announcements for Lunch this Wednesday at Logans, Annihilation at Old School w/ SA, July 4th workout at TFY for reading of Declaration of Independence.

It was a lively group this morning at The Sandlot. Hopefully the PAX got their money’s worth. Great to see Papa Johns out there. Hopefully he will join us again and bring Squirt along too.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

When Whoopee asked me to take over as Site Q of the famed GasHouse, it did not take long to HC. However, when not out of town, I tend to feel obligated to be there, whether I’m leading the workout or not. Any of you old Site Q’s feel that way? Other than the Q vs. Q challenge, I’ve been present each Saturday that I was in town. When filling the June Q list, I noticed Wirenut had an opening on June 10th. I recall last year he and Whoopee did a Q swap, so #repeat. It had been a minute since my last Old School Q. I do recall the beer workout being deployed. But Leppard’s trying to get cured off the White Claws these days so better not tempt him too much. The idea that kept coming back was the Weinke Freight used in his Q vs. Q. It was a good plan. It had a great mix of block work and running. So, my opponent that day likes to pay homage to F3 men with his WODs. While this grouping of exercises have nothing to do with his name but the inspiration certainly does. Let me spread my seasoning on it a bit and I give you “The Freight.”

Warm-up: all IC x 10: Seal Jacks, Imperial Walkers, Side to Side Lunge, Gravel Pickers, Arrows, MNCs

Grab a block and walk over to the street side of the paved asphalt. The workout has a start, middle, and end. There would be various ways of travel between the 3 segments.

1. 10 burpees; murder bunny to middle cone, run to other side – 10 more burpees
2. Run to middle for 10 hop overs, return to start
3. 20 Turtle crunches, run to middle for 10 hop overs, murder bunny to track
4. 20 OH Press, Murder Bunny to middle, bear crawl to start, 10 CDDs
5. Run across the field, take a full lap around the track
6. 20 Heels 2 Heaven, run w/ block, 10 blockees, run w/ block, 20 SSH
7. 10 Curls, OH Block Carry, drop block, run, 10 HR merkins
8. 15 jump squats, run, grab block – lunge walk to other side, 15 jump squats (legs were shot by now)
9. OH block carry to middle, 20 derkins, leave block, run, 20 merkins
10. Take a full lap around the track, broad jump to middle, 20 rocky balboas, murder bunny, 10 hammers and 10 big boys
11. NUR across to other side, 20 Imperial Walkers
12. 10 Mike Tysons, run to middle, 10 Parker Peter, run, 15 block curls
13. 10 Thrusters, run w/ block to other side, 10 block pull overs
14. 20 Penguin crunch, run to other side, 20 Turtle Crunch
15. Take a half lap around the track, murder bunny to the middle, 20 dips, crab walk, 20 Genie Knee to Elbow
16. 20 OH presses, carry block to other side, 20 skull crushers
17. Run a full lap; murder bunny to the middle, carry block to other side – >> END

COT: Prayers for Gumby’s family, Ratchet (Jackson Hall), Norwood, Anchor Man’s Sister in Law procedure. Announcements for 3rd F Lunch 6/21 at Logans, 7/4 TFY – 0700 – 0745 workout, then reading of Declaration of Independence.

Notes: Flintstone organized the Lightening EC at 0600 which many of the PAX completed. That took a bit of wind out of the sails, especially the First F Q.  Just remember, extra credit is extra. It’s not the Q’s fault to make your second workout easier. Always good to test yourself, but be prepared. I was happy with today’s workout. Block work is always a tough one but add in the running and keep the pace going, the heart rate remains elevated. The chatter wasn’t too bad today but notably some of the louder voices were missing, so that made it easier on the old Q. The Q swap was as good as expected so I could get to a different AO and be around the NOGA crowd – especially to get Timeout afterwards.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead,

Short Sale

A few weeks ago, JJ had the Q for Annihilation and it damn near killed me. I was not mentally nor physically prepared for that assault. How do you get better? You tackle tough challenges so with today’s GasHouse Q, I focused on the second element of JJ’s Weinke and built from there. More on that in a moment. I’ve been out of town the past two weeks, so nice to be at the friendly confines of the GasHouse, only the landscape has severely changed as the reconstruction of Grier Middle School has leveled the athletic fields and old gym where back in the day as a gangly pimple faced kid in the mid 80’s, life was beginng to swirl. But I digress, there is a workout to lead.

Warm-up:

• Seal Jacks IC x 10 (except I was about to cough at 8 so the inflection changed while I tried not to barf in my mouth, so some PAX ceased fire)
• Side to Side Lunge IC x 10
• Runners Lunge Twist – Right (no cadence, just hold)
• Runners Lunge Twist – Left (here ends the YOGA portion of the workout)
• Arrows IC x 10
• Pledge

Mosey – Hushpuppy was rolling hot and asked where to meet – Garrison Boulevard Business Park – see you in a few.

We arrived at said location and I shared the plan of “The Nasty JJ”. It was not received warmly, even by JJ who created this monster. At the low point of the parking lot, 11 Mike Tysons, run up the hill, stop at the entrance for a burpee, continue to the Business Park sign, 11 Imperial Walker Squat (count the squat), run down the hill, stop again for 1 burpee. Each exercise was 11 reps each time. We did this for 11 minutes and hence the Nasty JJ will live on in lore forever.

Once complete, the next phase began for Every 2 Minutes on the Minute. The PAX would mosey to a pre-selected destination but along the way every two minutes would break for:

• 10 SSH
• 10 Tabletop Crunch (aka Turtle Crunch)
• 10 Penguin Crunch
• 10 Merkins
• 10 Squats

Now some of you are thinking, this sounds simple, how does this get all “short-saled up?” It didn’t, just stuck to the plan, weird, huh? Felt weird, but we moseyed and had 2 stops along Laurel Lane until we arrived at the intersection of Nottingham and Laurel for the 3rd installment. This is where the Watt’s Up portion of the workout kicked in. Maybe a year or two, Watt’s Up Q’ed GasHouse and we arrived at this same spot for a terrible version of 4 corners using Laurel, Woodvale, Dorset, and Nottingham as our corners and had a handful of exercises to complete. Instead of doing multiple rounds, I opted for 1 due to time. But like Watt’s Up’s version, its was a burner where we completed the same count of the aforementioned 5 exercises. Once all 4 corners were done, we then moseyed back down Nottingham to left on Dorset to right on Scotch – time for one more set (this made 8 total sets). We then continue to the end of Scotch which is a nicely elevated cul-de-sac; perfect for a quick Triple Nickle. Somehow saying Triple Nickle doesn’t sound right unless it’s Sister Act’s gravelly voice. So now repeat after me: “Triple Nickle.” There, you’ve got it. Only we’re not doing the standard SA set of burpee, IMT, IWS, HRM. No, we’re running low on time, so I opted for 5 plank jacks at the bottom and 5 shoulder taps (sgl ct) at the top, for 5 rounds. We had 7 minutes to get back to base upon which we arrived right on time.

COT – 7/4 at TFY – reading of Declaration of Independence following the workout; Seek to add Flintstone’s Thunder & Lightening challenge to your schedule. Prayers: Hunk a Junk shared about an acquaintance in Mt. Holly who’s son took his life; Hushpuppy asked for prayers as his new relationship which combines two families with 6 (?) kids of all ages.

Moleskin: 1Peter 2:21 “For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps.” I didn’t share this verse today, but reflecting on the workout and discussion among PAX, it is fitting. I mentioned the idea of the workout came from two strong men in JJ and Watt’s Up. Both have strong discipline in visible areas of their faith and fitness. Today’s plan came together from previous workouts they had led and it was a bit daunting to see if we could tackle, but we surely did. Our group of 5 ended up with 3 miles under our belts (Stroganoff at 8 after some EC before). At various times whether in F3, our familes, our communities, churches, or workplaces, we take a leadership role. But in most instances, we followed some path set before us. Jesus did that for us. Hearing Hunk A Junk share that a young man ended his life is tragic. Life is not easy and there will always be a challenge to face. Trust in the Lord and seek a brighter path that can pull you through is a reliable source.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

I woke up at 5:06 am this morning. If I were posting normally, I’d begin frantically running around to get contacts in and into workout attire. But not this morning. I relieved myself and then crawled back in the fartsack. Only today, the fartsack would eventually be defeated. I slept another half hour before I began morning duties of walking our dog and getting her fed. I had plenty of time that I arrived at the newest AO in our region located in McAdenville. JJ and Flintstone were already in the parking lot, Flintstone having completed some EC in the form of his new EC “Thunder” workout. The cavalcade of vehicles began rolling into the lot. It was time to go. A brief disclaimer opened, and some light chatter ensued.

Warm-up:

Imperial Walkers IC x 11, Toy Soldiers IC x 10, the Patented Right over Left IC followed by the Patented Left over Right IC (apparently, I don’t count the cadence correctly), Arrows IC x 10, SSH IC x 10

Thang: stay in the circle, we’re doing Mary first b/c the former Nantan requested a core workout since he is limited by a bum elbow. We did all of these exercises for 30 seconds each w/ no rest between.

• Reverse Crunch
• American Hammer
• Raised Penguin Crunch
• Turtle Crunch
• Legs at 90 degrees, Alt Toe Touch
• Bear – R hand to L knee
• Bear – L hand to R knee
• Burps
• Genie Crunch: elbow to knee
• Genie Crunch: knee to elbow
• Heels 2 Heaven
• Crunchy Frog
• Hollow Hold
• Ski Abs

The offer was made to remain in the parking lot and do 4 more sets of that – the PAX quickly opted for a mosey. We exited the parking lot and played frogger to move up Main Street. Thankfully no PAX were harmed in the travel. Once passed Terra Mia and the salon, we nestled into the small lot between buildings. Ready for the Stack and Run? Sure you are…goes like this. 50 single count SSH’s run down Poplar Street (the back street) hang a left and another left to circle back up Main Street to our spot. Follow this routine stacking the exercises after each lap:

• 50 SSH, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, 20 HR Merkins, lap
• 50 SSH, 40 LBCs, 30 jump squats, 20 HR Merkins, 10 Burpees, lap

This is where time was running low. The Q’s M had scheduled an 8 am vet appointment for our sick dog so I had to cut this short a bit. Hustle back to the base.

COT: Annihilation at the Yank tomorrow w/ Boudin, FIA starting in Belmont – tell your M, July 4th at the Yank 7-8 am workout followed by reading the Declaration of Independence. Prayers: Orangeman asked for prayers for the Grant family and shared praise for his daughter and family relocating to Gastonia. Next Q’s for Snooze will be Tesla on 6/9 and Radar 6/16, and Oompa on 6/30 (open is 6/23).

Debrief with Flintstone, we may relocate where we meet in McAdenville. Navigating the 3 point intersection could be problematic so moving up Main Street could alleviate that and still leave plenty of room to explore at this new AO. We had 7 guys double post having suffered through Breaker’s Q at Tequila Sunrise. A handful of guys walked to the coffee shop for 2nd F. Hopefully one of your summer Fridays allows you to hit the snooze button and still get to a workout.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

It’s 0530 am and you’re semi awake in your bed. You know the workout you had planned to attend just began. You hit the snooze button once or twice and then gave up. The fart-sack won that battle. You feel guilty and maybe a little pissed off. We’ve all been there. I think one of the most common excuses from the men we recruit is “that’s too early.” I battle that myself, even as a veteran PAX. Truth be told, I hate getting up early. As I type out this preblast, it’s approaching 11 pm on Sunday night. I’d say I’m more of a night person.

So how can I help you with this occasional fartsack challenge – might I interest you in a workout that begins a little later, at least on a Friday? I see that little gleam in your eye. While I have your attention, allow me to explain more. On Friday mornings this summer, at 0645 am an shovel flag will be posted in McAdenville. If you’re on Main Street facing Pharr Yarns, it will be the larger parking lot to your left and we’ll set up closer to the river. We’ll do a bootcamp workout for 45 minutes. After the workout, there are a few options nearby if anyone would like to have some 2nd F time with a coffee.

We’ve enjoyed McAdenville under the lights at the Christmas Town 5k and one special event on a Labor Day. This summer time workout will be a good test run for this AO to see if it can find a permanent slot on our workout schedule. When I pitched the idea to the SLT, they were agreeable. The later time at 0645 offers the option for a double post (Slaw is already eyeballing more skillet opportunities). Or it could give you a little extra sleep from a heater at Midoriyama or if you have an extra IPA on a Thursday evening. So hopefully you’ll join me one Friday morning this summer for Snooze, beginning Friday, June 2nd at 0645.

Hit me up if you have any questions or would like to get on the Q schedule.

It seems as people age, the weather forecast and weather conditions are central to one’s daily life. Take my Mom as an example, who believes NBC’s Brad Panovich guidance ranks #3 following the Lord and her doctor (her pharmacist might be a tight #4). All I have to do is bring up an outdoor event or traveling on the road and my dear Mom will share Brad’s forecast. I think she’d adopt him if he was willing. For those of us with an upcoming Q, we tend to pay a slight bit more attention to the weather to know if our plans will work or need an Omaha.  Aside from the Convergence, there were some recent downpours we suffered through. Linus shook his fist at the sky even with thunder and lightening in the area. If you recall, last week, there was a 70% chance of rain for Saturday which not only looked ominous for my Q, but also for the free ticket I had to the Wells Fargo golf tournament. But fate can be fickle and luck would turn for the best and the 70% rain become warm and sunny instead. Whoohooo. There was no holding back on my Weinke now (…that’s what she said!)

Some old but friendly faces gathered in the circle at the GasHouse. Just as we were to begin, here comes Roscoe, Sargento, and Quiche!! all with ruck sacks on. Did Quiche get drugged and not realize he was walking with a weighted backpack? Quick, someone check that cargo load for actual weights and not a few Diet Cokes. It would later become discovered it was the Big Cheese’s birthday, so maybe Quiche was carrying cupcakes. So those two kept on while Roscoe joined the warm-up. A brief disclaimer – proper form rather than speed – you vs. you – simple reminders that us stubborn men have to hear from time to time.

Warm-up – all in cadence, 10 reps:

Imperial Walkers, Toy Soldier, Seal Jacks, Side to Side Lunge, Mtn Climbers, Peter Parker, Parker Peter, Plank Jacks, [walk your feet in to downward dog] CDD’s – once the Mtn Climbers began, we remained in plank – that got the shoulders working and loose. Some were ready for the COT, but there was 50 more minutes to go.

Thang:

Mosey to Grier and line up across the curb facing the gym. We’re going to do some lower body work but we’re going to do it while balancing on the curb which also works your core. Begin with 15 calf raises, flare toes out for 15, turn toes in for 15 more.  Now the challenge of performing squats with your toes on the curb and heels off – this emphasizes your quads and balance – go for 20 OYO. Time for upper body – the Red Reaper – 15 merkins + 30 shoulder taps + 15 merkins. Back to squats for 20, another round of Red Reaper. Taking a brief break, Stroganoff noted he was tired of watching his reflection in the glass windows, so we’ll flip and go heels on the curb for 20 squats and end with a third round of Red Reaper.

Flintstone said he heard a train…so as we mosey out of the parking lot and hit the speed bump, we give 5 burpees for the train. When I got to the steps for cross Garrison, another train (or so I claimed) whistled in the distance – let’s do 5 more burpees. We hustle to the youth hut at the top of the hill. Wall sits waiting for the 6. EZ Rider’s son PickleRick is along with us this morning and at this point likely wishing he’d remain in the fartsack. Once all are present and accounted for, we do Whoopee’s new favorite, Australian Mtn Climbers x 15 followed by 30 Donkey Kicks; recover. We followed that routine two more times. Mosey down the hill toward the ballfield. Upon arrival, Stroganoff says “this is the Short Sale workout I was expecting.” I hope that is a good thing.

At the Q vs. Q Championship, I pulled out the workout and added a few stations. No team competition this day, just an individual station for each PAX with the timer once again being the Murder Bunny and hop over. The other stations were a You vs. You AMRAP:

• 5 Thrusters + 10 Block Curls
• 5 Perfect Form Merkins + 10 Big Boys
• 5 Jump Squats + 10 Mahktar N’Diayes
• 5 Burpees + 10 SSH
• 5 Curls + 10 Shoulder Press
• Monster walks (put a band around your ankles – side step 10 right, 10 left – glutes will feel it)
• 5 Bent Rows + 10 Hammer Curls

We managed to make it through 2 rounds. PickleRick needed CPR to revive him. Each station was clearly marked and there was plenty of light. The mumble chatter was not directed toward the Q nearly like a few weeks ago. This is a full body beatdown that most PAX should have felt the soreness over the weekend.

COT: Prayers: Sargento’s uncle, Flintstone’s parents, Turtleman, Termite’s son, Rachet’s 2.0; Announcements: Annihilation is at GasHouse next week. JJ with the Q and early rumor is running shoes are recommended. See Purple Haze pre-blast on family bike ride/mexican food/arcade. 5/13 CAM food drive help – see Flintstone.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

The forecast for this morning’s running of the Coconut Horse was ominous. Fortunately the temperature was a pleasant 61 degrees at game time and the rain was barely falling, if at all. The rare occurrence that I was 7 minutes early I observed Stroganoff stretching and Gavel getting an early start out of the gate. The rest of the Sum-britches gang arrived right on time. Apparently everyone got the hidden memo to wear neon tops. In this case, “seeing to be seen” is a positive and not just a social media post. At 0630, Stroganoff gets the itch to head out – I shove their bat-flipping boat off the dock as Flintstone’s pre-warm up routine required more muscle rolling.

I roll out of the parking lot with Flintstone – I share that Gavel is already on the course to which he replies “let’s go catch him…” That was not the challenge I was seeking this fine morning. I manage to stick with the svelt First F Q, discussing a variety of topics including the Convergence and Slaw appropriately winning the Belt! (BTW – NC State v. Va Tech is in Blacksburg on November 18th). We hit the bridge entering the greenway and Flintstone hits a stride that he begins gliding over the trail. After the Convergence, I spread 50 bails of pine needles yesterday afternoon and had nothing to offer at that point except watch the vapor trail (not that I would have kept up had I been fully rested and drank rocket fuel either).

Flintstone accomplished his mission to not only catch the neon Sum-britches gang, but Gavel as well. He then circled back for the slow Q and guided me home. Leading from the Six still counts I guess.

QSource – Dichotomy of Leadership which is a great discussion as we have learned through 4 chapters what is the answer? “it depends.” What Jocko and Leif outline are situations where hard decisions must be contemplated. No one enjoys the pressure of difficult decision, especially one that shapes your life. In Ramadi, the SEAL members of Task Unit Bruiser were faced with those pressure situations on a daily basis. In our personal and work lives, the challenges we face are not typically life threatening, but they can still be difficult and unique where one response may be different than the next. Today’s chapter on “When to Mentor, When to Fire” deals with personnel issues of when training or mentorship is not working, and the person is struggling. Jocko shares “most underperformers don’t need to be fired; they need to be led.” How much time do you invest on that person? (a: ‘it depends’) Are they trainable? Is there a different role they should be doing? Or is the Black Tahoe best for all involved? This chapter resembles QSource on Accountability – Team (Q4.8). Today’s group agreed documenting low performance is a necessary tool to cover a leader. Make sure the person understands the “why” and the consequences. We all shared some thoughts and questions, including the true source of “FNG” (Whoopee swears DREDD got it from Forest Gump…).

Prayer requests: Huck, Jane Fonda, the Long family traveling; Announcements: look for pre-blast from Purple Haze about 2nd F bike trip; 5/13 – JJ leads Annihilation at GasHouse – JJ promised a burner – I expect a combination of SA’s physical beatdown with Linus’ mental trickery – should be special.

Happy Birthday Whoopee

If you haven’t heard, I was the Champion in the QvsQ challenge recently. I think all but one person have accepted that honor. Those of you that are golfers will know the British Open winner is crowned with the title Champion Golfer of the Year. I think since the PAX have spoken the same accolade applies here. So with that honor, the 5 PAX that posted this morning Downtown were the beneficiary of what would be a most excellent beatdown. No rookies so we started like this:

Warm-up:

• Seal Jacks IC x 10
• Imperial walkers IC x 10
• Toy Soldiers IC x 10
• Imperial Walkers IC x 10
• Side to Side Lunge IC x 10
• MNC’s IC x 10
• Arrows IC x 10

No need to mosey, we’ll stay under the shelter even though it wasn’t raining. Mary will get some love on the front side. Each exercise was 30 seconds of core work: Leg lifts, American Hammer, Raised Penguin Crunch, Turtle Crunch, 90 Alt Toe Touch, Plank position: R hand to L knee then L hand to R knee; go to elbow plank – hip roll-overs, bank on your six: Genie crunches, elbow to knee then knees to elbows, Heels 2 Heaven, Crunchy Frog, Hollow Hold aka (douche) canoe, and Ski Abs to end. I gave demos where needed but the instructions were clear, so no complaints.

Now let’s mosey to the parking deck. Way back in Round 1 of the QvsQ challenge I uncorked Walk the Plank but the mumble chatter was high and the PAX were not listening well. My 5 students were curious and attentive – much easier to communicate the plan which requested they find a parking spot on the wall side of the deck. At the beginning of the parking lot line do 10 HR Merkins then Joe Hendricks along the parking line toward the wall. Stop and do 10 Donkey Kicks. Then plank-walk left toward the other side of the parking spot. Stop and do 10 Australian Mtn Climbers. Then bear crawl along the line to the left side opening. That completes the square and by now the shoulders are feeling it a bit. So, let’s go two more rounds.

To give a break to our upper body, we went back to the core with 20 LBC’s, 20 Raised Penguin Crunches, and 20 Ski Abs.

Moving on – PAX still listening to what instructions I have. No challenges, how nice it can be sometimes to enjoy this fine group of gentlemen. We’ll use the levels of the parking deck for a 4 level escalator instead of 4 corner. Round 1, Level 1: 5 burpees – run to Level 4, descend the stairs. Round 2: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips – run to level 4, descend the stairs. Round 3: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips, Level 3: 20 jump squats, run to level 4, descend the stairs. Round 4: Level 1: 5 burpees, Level 2: 10 eccentric dips, Level 3: 20 jump squats, Level 4: 40 merkins, descend the stairs.

At this time we had 8 minutes left so I offered the PAX a choice – run it back or head back for more Mary. Purple Haze said option C – stop at the wall at the condos on MLK for some wall sits and dirty hook-ups. Seuss selected wall sits with marching and arm extension varieties. We hustled back to the pavilion and did flutters and big boys until time.

COT: Prayers for Stephanie (Pallbearers niece) that is dealing with cancer diagnosis; Stephanie – Watt’s Up teammate dealing w/ health issues; Ratchet’s 2.0, Huck, and Gump (Seuss visited with him yesterday and he learned of his sentence). Announcements: 2F lunch in Dallas this upcoming Wednesday, Flash relay (see Flintstone), 4/29 Convergence at Midoriyama 0700.

The rain held and we stayed dry – I guess some Q’s have that kind of command on the weather. The attendees bought into the instruction and supported the instruction to receive a core focused workout that will only benefit them. Thanks to those men to enjoy the fellowship. Oddly Pallbearer was the only under 50 PAX, hence the title.

Until the next one – thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale

Champion Q of the Year

Pregame: If you watched UCONN win the National Championship Monday night or for that matter, any Final Four in the past 20 years, you may have recognized one of the scripts on the sideline “The Road Ends Here.” It serves as a statement for the journey of 68 teams trying to reach the pinnacle of college basketball. So too could that expression lend itself to 2023 F3 Gastonia’s March Madness Tournament. A brilliant idea that began as a gleam in Flintstone’s First F mind. As a fan of creativity, I applaud the concept, as did most of the PAX judging by the elevated attendance for each match up. Hat’s off to Flintstone. If you’ve been under a rock this version of a tournament came together after the PAX were surveyed to identify the top 8 Q’s. There was no specific criteria for voting. As Sister Act declared, it’s a popularity contest. Possibly, but judging by the contestants, the 8 men bring their brand of Q to each workout that may have separated themselves in some way. The order was: Freight, YHC, Sister Act, Roscoe, Broke, Whoopee, Balljoint, and Wirenut. Due to some scheduling conflicts, the matchups didn’t quite match up as they would in normal seeding. As the tournament progressed, it came down to #1 vs. #2 at Folsom on Aprils Fools Day. Here is a bit about how it went.

Gameday: Actually, Friday night before Gameday. As I knew I would be in NOGA where Freight returned after trying to live the uppity life in Belmont, I thought best to make an appearance at the Rusty Rabbit Happy Hour. It’s been quite a while since I even made it to the Belmont Bottoms Up and I’d never made it to Dallas. Time to press the flesh and maybe buy a vote or two. I walk in the door to see Freight had the same idea. The Mayor (who was hunting Saturday and not able to vote) along with Def Leppard. Gumby came along later. I bought a round anyway, even bought Freight a Leinenkugel (which maybe the Belmont hasn’t quite left him yet – I wonder if the barkeep at the Rabbit knew they even had that brand). We kept the conversation polite. Afterwards, I headed over to Folsom to do some reconnaissance.

Freight had selected to go first in his two matches, but as a bit of gamesmanship, he deferred to me on this morning. I sensed something and after some thought realized Folsom began at 0630. My workout would almost be entirely in the dark. Well played sir. Only I solved that problem with a generator and some floodlights, well sort of – to the best that I could get the lights to show. As I completed my set up Saturday morning I complimented my opponent on his strategy. Thankfully at Q-Source, we studied Jocko’s Extreme Ownership and Chapter 9 is Plan – very resourceful – I highly recommend it. As the clocked ticked toward 0630, I handed out F3 wristbands and placed stickers on the PAX so I could easily divide them into teams of 5 which was necessary for my workout. We had over 30 men arrive. Flintstone gave instructions and turned it over to me – no warm-up, let’s mosey.

First Half: we arrive in the traditional parking lot of Folsom by the tennis court and the soccer field. I stop at my generator to flip on the lights that spotlighted two rows of stakes with signs identifying exercises. Now for the challenge to explain to the herded cats.  Everyone was split in teams of 5 which would align to the lanes I had established with 5 stations for each PAX to rotate through. My Q Fail was I didn’t identify the team’s sections which was made more complicated in the limited light. I did my best to place the groups at their spots and since we had 32, assigned me and another PAX to join a team and mirror someone. I of course mirrored Freight – best to keep a close eye and diffuse any mumble chatter. The stations were:

1. Thrusters x 5 and Block Curls x 10
2. Perfect Form HR Merkins x 5 and Big Boys x 10
3. Murder Bunny 15 yds + 10 Hop Overs + Murder Bunny 15 yds to return (Timer)
4. Jump Squats x 5 and Mahktar N’Diayes x 10
5. Burpees x 5 and SSH x 10

Station 3 was the timer so however long it took that teammate to execute, Stations 1, 2, 4, & 5 would perform the 2 exercise set as many times as possible. Because the PAX enjoy competing, I bought a bunch of plastic Easter eggs to use as points. Every time a circuit was completed, the PAX tossed an egg in their team’s bucket. This was done to push all the PAX at all stations so they could hold up their end for the team. Standing around to catch your breath mean less eggs in the bucket, or so it was to be. Q Fail #2 – I should have bought more eggs (or devised a different scoring system). It was organized chaos, but I intended to begin with a difficult workout which was based on an Iron PAX version that I modified for this event. It was designed to test the men which it seemed to do. Team #4 was declared the winner.

After about 15 minutes, it was time to move on for Thang #2. Now I’d have to dig through some of my work notebooks to show you the time this idea formulated. Safe to say it’s been a year or so before the Pandemic or as all of us in F3 Gastonia recall the year Def Leppard tried to shut us down. But I digress…in the back of my work notebooks, when I get an idea for a workout, I sketch it out. I’ve waited for the right situation to break out the Tennis Workout. Today was the day. Simple, fun and effective. Write down an exercise or two on a ball. The ball gets smacked down the court, the PAX chase it and do a declared number of reps. They bring the ball back and have another one hit. Kind of like playing fetch with your dog. Originally, I wanted a tennis ball machine that would shoot out balls like a cannon, but I couldn’t find one to borrow. I recalled the PAX enjoyed my bartenders so much when I whooped SA with the Beer Workout, I invited Turtleman, Christine (his M) and Nancy (his neighbor) back for the main event. It helps Christine and Nancy are high level USTA players and they certainly look the part. After about 5 or 6 rounds of that, my time was done.

Second Half: Freight hurried the group back to the soccer field requesting each PAX grab a concrete block on their way. He had set up cones on the sideline and middle of the field width. I have to admit, pretty simple, but by this point, the sun was rising and he had plenty of light – who couldn’t do this? He gave instructions that each set would be timed and the penalty for be 1 burpee for each PAX that did not cross the finish line by the specified time. This would be tested quickly. The first set began with a murder bunny to midfield, leave the block, sprint to the other sideline and return in the time limit. Most made it and we may have had a 3 burpee penalty. I could take you through the remaining 13 rounds that were on the Weinke (loser shares their Weinke, winner writes the backblast, consider yourself lucky as an award winning Backblast writer – BAM! there’s another award Freight hasn’t won! – Freight better start picking up the 6). So, I’ll highlight a few details of this Q. Admittedly, we did some sprinting which does up the heart rate, but there were a whole lot of 10 counts, and I do mean a LOT! After a few of these rounds, this workout looked eerily similar to Freight’s first round match against Broke. Sure we did a few Murder Bunnys and some block work, but still had the same burpee per man penalty…doesn’t sound very creative to me. I will give it to Freight, next to Tool Time, Freight is the Prince of Mumble Chatter and my full intention was to give that chatter back as much as I could. So with a 10 count occurring after each return, seemed like a lot of standing around to me…I attempted to take over the Q. Freight quickly countered by shouting instructions and something about my portion being a FIA workout (note, the ladies were eye candy, not workout instructors or partners). One of the exercises, over 20 PAX missed the time requirement, so the Q quickly Omahaed dialing back from the 1 burpee per man to a static 10 count (don’t do it if you can’t Q it!). An exasperated Freight requested Slaw provide a German 10 Count. At this point it was fair to say Slaw was Co-Q-ing the workout. Most PAX, in particular Sparky were not abiding by Freight’s signal to drop the green flag, instead running well ahead of the word “Go” and no one, in particular Def Leppard participated in the burpee penalty. It got so disorderly Broke just up and left (he confessed he would have voted for me anyway). Most PAX were begging for something creative to happen but Slaw kept charging ahead with Freight’s Weinke. Finally, Father Time finally gained the advantage to call this segment and have us mosey back to the flag.

Postgame: At the circle, I took the opportunity to share refreshments with my brothers. Beer for those that wanted it and water for the rest. I also awarded Team 4 with Starbucks gift cards. Yes, votes can be bought. Now I knew I was up against a decidedly homefield advantage, but there were enough friendly faces that maybe would vote based upon effort or bribes. As the cards were distributed, Freight took an early lead. It did not look pretty for yours truly, but like election night, we know California is going blue, so let’s ride this thing out. About midway, I made some ground and then it got tight, like a pair of Sunday pants after Easter brunch. With only a few votes left, the card with “Murder Bunnies” was announced – Flintstone shuffled it to the bottom of the stack. A few more votes went my way and now we were dead even with the last remaining unnamed card. Flintstone said “someone needs to identify their vote…” A moment of silence as we waited and the former Nantan stepped forward and claimed the card, but now he had the deciding vote. The entire tournament champion rested in Sargento’s hands. Much like 1983 when Derek Whittenburg heaved up a shot toward the basket. Would this prayer be answered? Your damn right it was – BAM – just like Lorenzo Charles slammed home a Wolfpack win, baby! Finally, being part of the Wolfpack paid off. Thanks brother. Go Pack! We have a winner!

Announcements: Whitewater relay race – see Flintstone; Prayers: Ratchet’s 2.0, Flintstone’s father’s treatment, Huck, Turtleman, and others.

Moleskin: First, it’s an honor to be selected to compete in this event. Second, I appreciate all that particpated. Whether you voted for me or not, the size of the PAX and respect for each opponent certainly provided the challenge. If you’re still with me on this novel, I’ll share a truth. Freight may be #2 among the PAX but I voted Freight #1 on my ballot. I also had SA, Broke, Roscoe, and Whoopee listed as well. Obviously, I’m in a majority of PAX that agree those guys bring a solid Q and if I had more votes, Balljoint and Wirenut would be there too. All bring something different, and that is what make our brotherhood of Freed to Lead a great test of leadership. I’ll admit to being a bit of a Q snob, but when I see Freight’s name on the schedule, I try to attend as I know it will be a test. It may be one that I suffer through, but I know the workout was well planned. He was a worthy opponent. I think I enjoyed the gamesmanship as much as the event itself. I may have even planted a fake Weinke for him to find when cleaning out the van after the P200.

Work has been crazy busy as I’m part of a project implementation going in phases from now to July. If I wasn’t thinking about work or family, my mind was on each round of the workout. I know my stuff is complicated, but rest assured each element was thought through. I appreciate the grace of you guys to entertain my type of workout whether it’s in this format or just a regular gloomy morning. Hopefully in due time you’ll think back on this one for the tennis ball or maybe the easter egg scoring system – if it left an impression (and some soreness) then I did my job.

There is no way I could have done this on my own. I had plenty of input from friends that gave solid advice. They know who they are. I also need to thank Turtleman, his M Christine and Nancy who were happy to participate in two of my Q’s. (For those curious, Christine is the blonde and Nancy is the tall one). Let me know if I need to recruit them for a future event. A handful of guys stuck around to clear the field and Ash Pond helped me return the blocks. Thanks to all of you that helped.

Finally, I’ve reached the End of the Road. It’s a good thing because I’m not sure what tricks I had for another workout. Hell, who are we kidding? I’ll come up with something, Until the next time, thanks for allowing me to lead.

Short Sale

Semi-Final of QvQ was set for Downtown with YHC matched against a younger whipper snapper, Balljoint. This would be much different than the quarter finals vs. SA for several reasons. #1, a weekday workout with only 20 minutes to fill and the standard 0530 start; #2, Balljoint is well liked, so I did not have pocket votes for douchyness; #3) BJ is creative, I support that criteria; and #4) Downtown may as well be a satellite AO for Folsom as it is often well attended by the bearded truck driving PAX. So how do I top the quarter final workout with kegs, cases of beer, and women bartenders? I’m not sure I can, but I had several ideas and began refining during the week. While the idea was clear in my head (don’t they all seem good on paper?), as I shared with a few folks, their initial reaction told me I could be in trouble. Uh, oh, not a good sign. Roscoe suggested a pre-blast, but I didn’t want to give away the idea. As you well know, the element of unknown at a workout is part of what makes this crazy thing work. I went with a limited concept of “Pre-Instructions” which drew expected push-back. But at this point, I was committed to the concept and it would be the sword that I either died on or raised in victory.

Friday morning, 0927 zulu time, PAX begin arriving to the base of the Rotary Pavillion. My workout is heavily dependent on the number of attendees, but more on that in a minute. I begin doing a series of head counts as I greet the PAX. I notice new names and faces, likely Folsom men – I’ve got my work cut out for me. We get to about 20 men and I feel strong about the division of teams necessary for the workout. Flintstone begins giving instructions. More men jogging to the circle, but I see several vehicles headlight beams streaming into the parking lot. The circle expands. I quickly go around for another headcount. Part of leadership is changing on the fly but sticking with the strategy. Ok, teams will be of 6 instead of 5. It’s now time and I begin the greeting, more PAX coming. I gave SA hell the week before about not saying the Pledge at the start. So we do that first because we’re America and we’re #1. More people have arrived. Ok, teams of 7 – getting worried. I wish Balljoint good luck because we’ve been keeping it classy all week and he’s a good dude. Let’s warm-up, Side Straddle Hops on my count, in cadence, ready position move: “one-two-three-One! Done” Let’s go. In my excitement, I literally stumble out of the gate and almost eat brick. That would have sucked, but I managed to hang on and get going. We ran to the Parking Deck for the big reveal of the childhood game: Connect Four. Instead of 7 columns & rows, I had 5 on my board. I’m going to attempt to explain this on paper so stick with me. As the PAX came into the deck I grouped them into four teams. More late arriving PAX are with us…now I’m at 8 per team, I think. Too late to adjust – gotta run with that.

The teams were assigned colors: Team Yellow vs. Team Blue, Team Red vs. Team Green and there would be parallel competitions. Each row on the board had 5 slots to correspond to a level in the parking deck. You need to have a foundation to build on put a chip on rows 2, 3, 4, or 5. The PAX would grab their colored folder on each level and select one of the blocks that contained two exercises and a total number of reps for the team to complete. For example:

• Side Straddle Hops – 125 total reps (single count)
• Flutter Kicks – 120 total reps (Count one leg only)

Here is where I mis-calculated (there is always a Q-fail in each workout, the secret is not letting the PAX know it at the time); the fail was the total team reps were calculated based on teams of 5. With teams of 8, it did not take long to complete the required number. Now, since I have your brief attention, the next time I do this work out, (I do think it has potential), note that if a bat flipper does 40 and the other teammates do 30, 20, 18 & 17, that’s within the rules. You could also have half the team do SSH’s and half complete flutters. I knew the instructions would be challenging to communicate, especially with the size of the group. Hopefully a few got it and would help the others catch on. The concept behind this organized chaos was exactly that: organized chaos. Who among the team would lead the charge? Who would focus on the strategy of placing the chip on the board? Because the teams were required to travel as ONE, no man was left behind. Now have 32 guys running all over the parking deck at the same time, yes, it was chaotic. In the end

Maybe some of the attendees gave some thought to the game or maybe you’re like, it’s a workout, I got more important things to do (as you should), but if you did, all four teams had the same strategy which was to go as fast as they could to get a chip on each level – essentially, out-race the other team. What I thought would happen, is one team would choose a defensive approach to place their chip as a “block” on the board and impact the other team’s purpose. Maybe next time. Unlikely the PAX looked at the 25 different circuits created in the book, but as the parking deck level went up, so did the challenge in the workouts (SA). And as mentioned, had I forecasted a better number of PAX, it would have pushed the teams more. Hey, but you do what you do.

So we finished early and that gave me time for some Mary which I hit a number of exercises in quick succession, getting to the famous Baby Makers which most PAX agreed after 10 reps, they were shot.

Notice how Team Blue attempted to cheat by putting a blue chip on the 3rd row w/o having a base chip on Row 2. If they had completed the exercise ahead of Team Yellow’s row 3, they could have blocked. Or they could have gone to Row 4 and blocked. Missed opportunity.

Balljoint Time – he takes over and runs to the corner of South Marietta/Franklin – Seal Jacks for the 6; we quickly move south another block, round the corner and stop in the middle of Second Ave. Balljoint says – this is real simple (he got me on that one), Triple Nickel, ‘Balljoint Style’ which for the non-Folsom crowd mean WTH? Evidently Balljoint Style means instead of 5 reps on the ends, you perform 10 – my Man! Way to “shortsale” that Q, we’re back on even ground, sort of. This routine has half the PAX running east to a handrail to perform 10 Australian Pull-ups, run east to the South/Second Ave intersection for 10 Perfect Form Merkins. When you cross the equator line, make it dirty and perform 5 jump squats with some type of ballerina thingy with your arms. Balljoint called it something that I can’t recall and I’m not throwing shade – I just don’t know what it was called. Not sure if it met SA’s double-black diamond standard. Maybe he can share his workout results and heartrate? We made 3 or 4 rounds before Balljoint Omahaed and had us head north on South Street – doing Seal Jacks waiting on Wirenut before crossing Franklin. Arriving at Main Street, he called 5 burpees (because it isn’t a workout if you don’t do burpees).  We arrived back to base.

I headed to my vehicle for the trusty cooler. Even though it was St. Patrick’s day and I had plenty of beer, I didn’t get any takers. Thankfully I had Gatorade and Water. Upon my return, I noticed not only did BJ have his cooler of drinks (I expected that, actually offered to go halfsies and got no response), but there were several boxes of Bojangles sausage biscuits. Dammit!!! Well played Balljoint. Future P200 teammate Sparky was called in for that part of BJ’s plan. Votes were cast and I got out of the gate about like my (and Balljoint’s) Wolfpack did against Creighton yesterday. Balljoint built a nice collection of index cards. As the disparity reached 12-5, I began thinking of a concession speech. But then Flintstone handed me a vote, and another and another. Did George Soros just show up with a bag full of votes?? Did Putin flip the switch on the electronic ballot counters? Something happened and I got on a heater. We drew even at 14 with one final card in Flintstone’s hand. He then handed it to me. 15-14 was the tally and I was lucky to have good support and maybe sold a few guys on the circus I brought to town. Thanks to the 30 PAX that came out to support this workout (not to non-attendee, Flintstone abstained from voting and Sparky didn’t cast since he just brought bribes). Now it is officially on to the final round where I will battle Freight for all the glory our region has to offer.  I hope you’ll make plans to attend. I assure it will be worth your while.

Prayer Requests: Ratchet’s 2.0 battling cancer; Pallbearer mentioned a young lady that took her life – prayers for that family. Pray for each other and the individual battles we face. Lean on each other for support. Announcements: Blood drive at Twisted Sugar, Belmont on 4/1 from 10-3 pm; Extinction Run presented check to Strong like AK last night at Primal.

QvQ will take a hiatus next week as we have some relays to run. Freight and I are in the same van next weekend – I wonder if QvQ topic will be discussed. So as of this moment, the finals will be hosted at Folsom on April 1st, presumably at 0630. More discussion I’m sure will follow in the upcoming days ahead. One of the Core Principles of F3 is Peer led, which I embrace the concept. I’ll leave you with this. What I have planned has been on the drawing board for about 3 years now. I’ll work on the edges and hopefully make it competitive with Freight’s Q. When you look back to recall a favorite workout, is it one where you did the same old same old? Or is it one that had a little flair? Like a wrestling theme (tag team partner Roscoe), golf, beer or bartenders? If that happens to be your cup of tea, you won’t be disappointed. But in case you are, let me know what kind of biscuits, coffee or beer you prefer. As the commercial sorta goes, beating Freight: priceless, for everything else, including votes, there’s MasterCard. Feel free to DM me your needs.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead.

Short Sale