F3 Gastonia

Fitness, Fellowship, Faith

Date: March 10, 2018

Mmm smell the bacon

Smaller crowd at the Yank this morning, but that’s okay, great to have everyone that could make it.  Norwood EH’d Gilligan into coming out for first time in a while, welcome back kotter!

Started with 10 SHS and 10 Imperial walkers.  Mosey up the hill to the old Stowe Mill office parking lot.  We passed by the clock at corner of Main and Catawba on the way.  Told the PAX that my office window is just above the clock.  The clock was stuck on 12:45 (not sure if am or pm) for several months.  From my Alabama roots, I told them that that time was called “15 to 1”, and it occurred to me  that a 15 to 1 workout would be in order.  In the parking lot we did 15 burpees, ran across the parking lot and did 15 jump squats.  Ran back for 14 burpees and so on until we got to one.  About halfway through the bacon aroma from Nellie’s was causing some to re-consider their morning decision.

Off to the dentist office for ten step ups each leg and plank against the wall.  Feet not on ground or on top of wall, but pressed against. Try it, you won’t like it.

Behind middle school for 11’s curb squats and derkins, PAX looking for the end by now, but not time yet.  On to soccer field where we pushed the blocking sled.  One pushes sled while the others perform an ab exercise.  Flutter kicks, WWI, LBC, American hammer, and a couple of others.

A little time left so we went to pavilion for a couple of rounds of dips and derkins.

On to the Yank for pledge, announcements and CIT.  Gilligan father in law facing surgery coming up, my M with some struggles.

Pleasure was mine


Bringing Sexy Back

Sparky first asked me about taking a Q last month. I am up for a challenge so I agreed but was hesitant about doing a Saturday to start. I have been at this 2 months, was I ready? “Don’t Q it if ypu can’t do it” is going through my head.
Then Sparky suggested a co-Q with Slaw. How could I not do that?!? Slaw will have my back. Sold!!!

I pull in about 6:25 – Slaw and a few PAX are already there. Def Leppard is in the house! Much respect to him, the hip is still hurting but he says he could not miss this. Pressure is on! Slaw and I are ready to deliver!


First, we gotta have music so I brought an Ion boombox. Note: a playlist has been carefully curated over the past 2 weeks by YHC with lots of input from Slaw. First off, Justin Timberlake’s Bringing Sexy Back. Of freakin’ course!!!! Slaw and I report to the center and alternate calling exercises.

  • SSH -15 IC
  • Monkey Humpers 10 IC
  • Plankjacks – 10 IC

Sister Act (maybe it’s Maybeline) is assigned responsibility to make sure the boombox follows us. Others are allowed to help. Oompa steps up.


Montross takes the Q lead for a bit. Can’t Fight The Feeling by Justin Timberlake is cranking throughout Folsom!
– Mosey to the flag and pledge. Pause the music for the pledge.
– Mosey to back parking lot. YMCA is cranking. There was dancing and several PAX joined in.
– Partner up for team abs, 150 LBCs, 100 Flutter Kicks, 50 Big Boys – alternate while teammate runs around parking lot. A little Wham! To get us going but enough “pop” music. We slide into some Whitesnake. Takes us back to a simpler time, one when Sister Act was rocking a sweet mullet (Folsom group text is brutal yo!)

Slaw takes the lead
– Mosey to shelter
– dips, merkins, step ups, derkins – stepping down from 10, 8, 6, 4, 2. Lots of argument about counting but Slaw keeps talkers in check. Queens of the Stoneage, 311, and Chris Stapleton help push us through.

Brandon takes the lead
– Short mosey to shore beside the ampitheater
– Triple nickles on a steep hill – 5 merkins, run down, 5 Slaw squats, Joe Hendrix up (5 rotations). YHC quickly realizes the Hendrix are a BAD idea and announces nur, bear crawl, or run is allowed. YHC is gassed but he is not quitting now! 80s and 90s rock plays on the rest of the way.

Slaw takes the lead
– mosey to the tennis courts
– corner burpees from 12 to 1…a modified version of the beast Slaw dropped on Folsom 2 weeks ago. There was chatter! Oompa carries the boombox all around the courts on his head.

We have a few minutes left so Mary…YHC forgets how Mary works (probably due to exhaustion).
– Pockets steps up and calls 25 flutter kicks IC
– Montross has regained his senses and calls LBCs – 25 IC
– I think someone called more burpees.


Whew, this was a fast paced workout!

Announcements and COT
Lots of prayer requests, Leppard’s family, cancer all around us, Silas has had a fever for a few days now, the family from Costner who lost their home to fire. Sorry if I missed some here guys! Slaw prayed us out.

Slaw also talked about how though we cut up and pick on each other (daily, again, the group text is BRUTAL), we all know it is in fun and this is a great group. I agree!!!


I have been coming to F3 since January 9, 2018…basically just 2 months. I was a Sad Clown for 18 years. I tried to start working out on my own and failed over and over. I am excited to say I am now in full remission of Sad Clown Syndrome and in better shape than I have been since I was 22! Sparky invited me in January and I quickly found it is exactly the motivation and support I needed to get in shape. I am getting better every week and it is because of the support and push from F3. Thank you all for your support! It was an honor to lead with Slaw today. Keep headlocking because there are more out there like me who want this and don’t even know it exists! Share it!

Next time we’ll sandbag more…

I’ve had the pleasure to attend a few Pain Labs in recent months and rest assured they are not a day off for anything except running. Rudolph has a good thing going Saturday mornings at the GasHouse. If you’re curious to find out more, the Pain Lab will be on the road at the Folsom Convergence 3/24, consider checking it out. I’ve been on the temporary IR this week, unable to sit long periods of time and Epsom salt baths are the most comforting part of my day. Hopefully that gives you enough information that I need to say no more except that being unable to workout for a week was driving me crazy. The Pain Lab was the perfect pool to dip my toe. So after we circled with Wojo and the boys for a brief warm-up, said the pledge, we split off to the amphitheater where the coupons lie in wait. We had 7 willing men ready to try my version of the Pain Lab. Clavin coming off IR and Moses brought his son Jake Dobbins a recent ECU graduate. Welcome to the fold Sparrow as we would later anoint him among our PAX. HIPPA came in hot off a 3+ mile ruck and kept the weight vest on – “STI – RONG” as accolades go. Another brief disclaimer to modify any of the “suggestions” written on the placards and do so at your own devise.  A similar version of this workout was conducted at The Goat last week and some modifications were necessary. But first, let’s get our blood flowing with a light start:

Warm-Up #2

  • SSH IC x 10
  • Scissor Runs IC x 10
  • Mummy Kicks IC x 10
  • Toy Soldiers IC x 10
  • Imperial Walkers IC x 10
  • Cotton Pickers IC x 10
  • Side to Side Lunge IC x 10

Since this is the PL and my muscles had not been worked in a number of day, let’s add some stretching:

  • Squat with elbow to knee press
  • R/L Shoulder Press to knee
  • Plank – move to R lunge; R arm high, L arm high, hamstring stretch
  • Plank – move to L lunge; L arm high, R arm high, hamstring stretch
  • Downward Dog, high plank, Cobra, Child’s pose


We had three groups of two and the Q as a single to cover 4 stations where the last station served as the “timer” performing 10 burpees in Round 1.

  • Circuit 1
    • R Lunge/Squat/L Lunge
    • Merkin Alt Toe Tap
    • Flutter Kick
  • Circuit 2
    • Squat / Imperial Walker
    • 10 / 2 Merkins
    • American Hammer
  • Circuit 3
    • Calf Raises
    • Plank Jack Merkins
    • Peter Parker

There was not a lot of mumble chatter, just grunts and subtle complaints but I had the 80’s Hair/Metal cranked up so maybe that drowned that nonsense (BTW – Judas Priest has a new album (do they still call them albums even though music is now downloaded?) and it pops like their good stuff from back in the day). I had on the Weinke to do another set but approaching the halfway point I wanted to speed it up – this time the timer was 3 burpees.

The next round would bring in the coupons to push the muscles more. The timer was 60 seconds for each round.

  • PVC Station
    1. V-Ups
    2. Rifle Squats
    3. Straight Arm Jacks
  • Half Block Station
    1. Lunge Press
    2. WWI – Pass the Block to your partner (try this one next time)
    3. French Curls
  • Full Block Station
    1. Curls
    2. Bench Press
    3. Kettle Bell Swings
  • Wall
    1. Dips
    2. Derkins
    3. Plank Brick Lift

I had much more on my Weinke but little time. The sandbags were next but then Tool Time and Tyson flew in signaling the boot camp was back, so I improvised a little…everyone circle up. With 6 sandbags (~25 to 30 lbs) spread out, the odd men would give the bag high, then squat to receive their next bag low. The even numbers would get the sand bag low, raise up and hand off high. Clear as mud, right? Lets give this a try and it sort of worked, picking up the pace before we reversed positions to work the opposite muscles. Probably more work on that one to get organized. With 5 minutes left, let’s tackle Mary as fast as we can.

  • Flutter Kicks IC x 10
  • Chopsticks IC x 10
  • Leg lifts x 10
  • Lazy Freddie Mercury (hand to knee instead of elbows) IC x 20 (Thanks Rudolph for the count)
  • American Hammer IC x 20
  • High Plank – Jingle Balls IC x 10
  • In/Outs – IC x 10
  • TIME!

COT – lot of prayers needed for our PAX and their family members and friends battling illness and in need of healing: Wojo, T-Square, others. Announcements: April 7th CSAUP 50 mile relay – see Tyson for more details, sign up via website. Community Foundation Speed 4 Need on display: register under Gastonia F3 and make our presence felt. Hunchback is the announcer for the event.

Moleskin – In a small block of space, without running one step calories can be burned and muscles can be stressed. The music is loud and the PAX are pushed as much as they desire to be, maybe a little more. You can’t help but find that extra effort with Rudolph’s verbal nudges like he expressed today to our FNG Sparrow. TopHat and Moses were a formidable duo clipping off their burpee count as were Clavin and Hippa. Query your mind to think where else could you barely know someone, if at all and now you’re working along side, pushing each other with positive encouragement? Fist bumping upon completion. There are a lot of problems that could be solved in the world with this type of brotherhood. We’re lucky to have this opportunity.

As with any new workout, the timing is the biggest challenge. But I made notes and will be ready for a Pain Lab in the near future, ready to employ my new sandbags. Until the next one, thanks for the opportunity to lead.

BTW – a black Under Armour hoodie jacket was left in the parking lot. Text me if it is yours (7045162193) and I’ll return it to you.

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