F3 Gastonia

Fitness, Fellowship, Faith

Day: March 14, 2016

Oh, How We Rationalize!

14 PAX posted early Saturday as we kicked off our GasHouse bible study with “the beginning.” The creation story instructs us to become wise by doing what Adam does: “tilling, naming, and cleaving,” that is, by working, speaking honestly, and building relationships.

Genesis 2:5 says there were no plants or herbs in the field, which sounds strange because God had already created everything. But Genesis 2:5 continues by explaining that there were no plants or herbs in the field because God had not sent rain and there was no man to till the ground. So perhaps verse 5 is telling us that there was nothing yet in existence that God and man created together.

What does Adam do in Genesis 2? Till the soil, name the animals, cleave to Eve in marriage.

Tilling: God provides rain, man provides labor, and there is food. “Tilling” might also represent all the other work people do: manufacturing, service, and so on … with all that God provides.

Naming: God creates the animals, man recognizes their “goodness” (Genesis 1), they are “named” as good for plowing, for food, and so on. “Naming” might also represent all the other things we discover: raw materials to make things, scientific research to learn how to heal the body, the moral law to live wisely, and the ability to speak truly and honestly.

Cleaving: God creates masculinity and femininity, men and women marry, a new family exists. “Cleaving” might also represent other kinds of relationships: business, social, and so on.

We become wise when we work, speak honestly, and build relationships according to God’s wisdom. Watch how it falls apart when Adam and Eve do not! “Naming” is the first to go: Serpent speaks dishonestly and Eve thinks unclearly (Gain wisdom from eating? really?). Adam incriminates himself (“I was naked”) and blames Eve. Eve claims she heard it from a talking snake (God: Sorry, didn’t make one of those.) Then “cleaving” becomes complicated. Adam’s “tilling” becomes unproductive, and Eve’s “labor” painful and dangerous.

God has mercy in the end: leather clothes to replace the leaves. They continue to live, work, discover the goodness of God’s world, build relationships, and seek God’s wisdom.

PAX continued the discussion: Interesting to read Genesis 1-3 as a story about seeking wisdom. Oh how we rationalize!

Thanks for your attention men! Looking forward to our sharing more of God’s wisdom.

– Monk

Special Olympics Burpee-a-Thon Preblast – May 7, 2016

Alright everyone, this is what you’ve been waiting for.  For the last two years, the Gastonia PD has been hosting a burpee torture event to raise money for Special Olympics NC.  Year number 3 doesn’t seem to disappoint.

This years format is out and here it is.  Gather up teams of three or four.  The event will start at Crossfit Gastonia (608 East 2nd Avenue Gastonia) at 9:00am with a new team going every 30 minutes.  Registration is $25/person. If registered prior to April 21, you will receive a 2016 law enforcement torch run t-shirt.  Contact Emily Burr at 704-866-6702 or burr_emily@cityofgastonia.com to register.  One person can register the whole team or you can do it individually.

WOD:  Burpee Relay – All team members begin behind the starting line.  When time starts, one team member will run to the burpee area (30′) and perform five burpees.  Once completed, he or she (yes ladies and co-ed teams are welcome) will run back to the team and tag the next team member, who will repeat the process.  The team will continue the relay until 300 burpees are performed or 20 minutes have passed.

There will be fitness vendors onsite,$1,500 in prizes to raffle and a food truck.  It doesn’t matter your skill level or age, all that matters is you show up, support a great charity and have a good time getting your A** kicked.  Bring your M or 2.0.


Can I have slice of Burpee Pi

Just another Monday morning with 6 pax looking to start the week off right.  I thought this was to be a running workout but apparently there was a strong desire to do Burpees…


  • SSH IC x20
  • Merkins IC x12
  • Mountain Climbers IC x 12

The Thang:

Off to the races – the pax ran out the parking to “the artwork” for 15LBC IC then without hesitations took off to the goat parking lot where we met our good friend Dora.  She had us do run the parking lot while other partner did 100 Merkins, 200 LBCs and 300 Squats and the pax had special request to finish with 50 Burpees.  Who knew they liked Burpees so much (thanks Whoopee).  The back to running – over the bridge and through the woods to the police station for a show of force with imperial walkers.  Then back to the Storm but not before there was request for more Burpees.  Finally made it to parking lot to finish with a 50 yard sprint to the flag for the belated pledge.  The Pax were strong this morning for all 3.14miles (Coincidence?)


Many thanks to having Outhouse back in the mix…Please keep him and his family in your prayers.

BRR is a go – see Whoopee if you’re interested.

3 1/2 weeks to the Brawl (April 9th)

As always it was an honor and pleasure to serve…

Until next time

Peace – Defib


The Updated Backwoods Brawl Pre-Blast: The Gashouse 1st Anniversary Celebration


Spring is in the air at Boss Hogg’s place and the flowers are blooming like the azaleas at Augusta National. The Big Leaf Magnolia’s are sprouting from the ground and the manicured fairways…wait a minute….this is the Backwoods Brawl…there are no manicured fairways.

We are less than a week away and here is what you need to know.

Where:  Boss Hogg’s Farm (Less than ten minutes from I-85 Exit 21 Cox Road Gastonia)

When:  April 9th     Parking starts at 0630 at Ranlo Church of God, 1825 Spencer Mountain Road. Please try to clown car from there for ease of parking at the AO so as to preserve the rustic nature of the farm and not scare the animals.  One of the goats is expecting and we don’t want to induce labor early.  Embrace your inner #minivan Centurion.  I do.

The workout will begin as close to 0700 as possible.  Please be early.  You don’t want to be “that guy” at the gate wanting to get in only to hear the squealing pigs and bleating goats and wondering what the heck is going on in there.  The good news is if you do show up on time you will be in for a beat down.  A few of us did a “dry” run a couple weeks ago and I am not good with distances but the whole thing is probably only about 3/4 of a mile, give or take 3 miles.  When we finish, the refreshmentrama/nightcluborama/dancing/birthing with goats follows on site.  Plan to stay as long as your M will allow, but probably 1100 or 1200 allows you all three F’s. There will be no bible study that morning and no workout at the Schiele but rather 3rd F Q’s throughout the workout, imparting leadership lessons or faith themes.  The 3rd F leadership lessons and faith Q’s will be Stroganoff, Bandit, T-Square, and Monk.  Our Pain Station Q’s will be Whoopee, Bandit, Stroganoff, Roscoe, and although Dolph can’t make it, we will have some of his toys to play with.  Sharing really is caring.  We will mosey together at a “fellowship pace”.  This is not a race but rather a celebration of all three F’s in one event. No man left behind.

What to bring:  Before you enter the Clown Car, you will want to have a bag packed with a towel or two, a change of shoes/socks, a change of clothes and perhaps some baby ointment for chafing.  There is a slight chance (100%) that you may get wet and sandy.  (Disclaimer forms to be signed at AO).  Refreshments provided but feel free to either donate in the collection jar at coffeerama or bring bananas, granola bars, apples, bottled water, or oat sodas.  Boss Hogg and I have your coffee covered.

There will be a “trail car” packed with a first aid kit, AED, and other safety items and we have doctors and dentists for all your cosmetic touch ups along the way.  Also, Boss Hogg has free firewood available if you need some.


On March 21, 2015, the F3 flag was planted at the Schiele Museum of Natural History.  A Saturday workout at the Schiele has been held every Saturday since with the exception of the F3 5 year anniversary convergence in Charlotte on January 1, 2016.  Additional workouts have been added throughout the course of the year and now there are ten workouts per week over six days and F3 Gastonia is a nomad no more.  The Founders have blessed the Gashouse as a region.

To commemorate the first year, an extended special beat down is in order featuring all the favorite exercises and memorable workouts from the first year.  Boss Hogg, who of course is near and dear to Roscoe’s heart, has generously offered up his farm for this epic celebration on the condition that Roscoe doesn’t call him my “little chubby buddy” like the characters in the tv show.  Imagine warming up with your brothers while in the midst of dogs, chickens, horses and of course goats!

The memories of the first year are many.  It was during Whoopee’s “300” workout, that Whoopee told the PAX that “in the movie “300”, the men in that movie were ripped, and now you will get ripped too!”  (Mumblechatter overheard, “FINALLY!”)

Perhaps it was the Saturday morning forecast of 100% chance of rain and very cold temperatures.  Bandit brought a huge sheet of vapor barrier to the middle school field and Whoopee and Dr. Feelgood stole their M’s dishwasher soap and coated the slip and slide.  After the beat down the PAX took turns sliding away across the field in a wet, soapy mess.  After the workout all the PAX helped Bandit fold up the tarp and attached it to the top of Bandit’s clown car to go to Panera for Coffeerama to combat the certain hypothermia that was setting in.

Maybe it was Bandit having an inquiry about the Goat Island AO on the F3 site.  Hoping it was a potential FNG, he responded with a welcoming introduction of what F3 means and information about the “Goat”.  Little did he know that it was actually a banker from BB&T in Cramerton inquiring as to the muddy footprints on the side of the bank and if they came from our F3 PAX.  This began the first Gashouse fundraiser to pay for the paint job at the bank.  Being a region of high integrity, we passed the hat and made it right.  We missed the opportunity to take photographs of the formal “check presentation” however, and I don’t believe Donkey Kicks have been performed at that AO since.

Speaking of the Goat, remember that time we welcomed an FNG where the Godfather was the Q and made some potentially embarrassing comments about himself.  When he welcomed the young looking FNG in the COT, he was worried he shared too much since he is a teacher at a local school.  He asked the young buck, “tell me you’re not a student at SCHS, to which the young buck declared, “Yes I am”.  You had to be there and there is more to the story but I won’t share it here.

I have heard of the Dr. Feelgood beat down at Martha’s house complete with pre-planted candles all across the gloom, Outhouse’s football game with a glowball, and Marthapalooza.   Some memorable workouts were Romper Room, Stroganoff’s Wolfpack Grinder, Dolph’s World, Bandit’s Crab/Bear Soccer, BA’s Cinder block beat down’s, and of course the Bojangle’s Biscuit compliments of Whoopee.

There was the recent C-Span/Chaser Guest Q-School and workout where they stressed the importance of the disclaimer. Anthrax knows the rest but the disclaimer became real after that one. #nobackwardsrunning

One memory that stands out is the FNG who posted only once before accepting an invitation to a second F event at the Hickory Tavern.  When the conversation came to the Q calendar, our new guy stepped up to lead a future Saturday morning workout.  His decision may have been influenced by the strong men he was surrounded by or perhaps the “curls” he had been performing at Hickory Tavern to work out his guns.  On the day of his VQ there were some strong leadership lessons followed by military formation with our Q calling the cadence.  As most new folks find out their cardio isn’t quite where it should be.  Less than half a lap in on the first lap around the track and maybe the second verse of “Two old ladies lying in bed, etc.” our Q began either grumbling unrecognizable sounds or complete “dead air”, leaving the PAX to start imitating the noises, mocking mercilessly, or leading other cadences, some which may have been inappropriate.  “Bobby” Jenkins became legend that day.

I encourage you to read “Freed to Lead” before the event as it will make the day all the more meaningful as we transform into modern day warriors.  It won’t make as much sense otherwise.

So for those F3Gashouse faithful and the select men that helped plant us and encourage us to grow, I say thank you.  This event will be challenging, fun, rewarding, and hopefully a great tribute to the first year of F3 in Gastonia.



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